


Salt and Pepper

by yellowumbrellagirl



Series: Salt and Pepper [1]
Category: Iron Man (Comic), Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-09-22
Updated: 2012-09-21
Packaged: 2017-11-14 18:56:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 37,086
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/518454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yellowumbrellagirl/pseuds/yellowumbrellagirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a reposting from fanfiction.net. My absolutely amazing college chum (aka godsofwar on fanfiction.net) had posted it there for me many moons ago. Non-cannon, takes place after the Iron Man movie, but with a completely original character thrown in for good measure. </p>
<p>Pepper's old college roommate is in town for the weekend, shenanigans ensue. I own nothing!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

In which Pepper snaps, and Tony’s Liver seeks its revenge.

She loved her job, she really did. It is amazing how few people liked what they did. But there were times. . . Times like right now, where being Tony Stark’s PA filled her with a molten rage. No one would know to look though, that’s what made her so damn good. 

She had told him. Multiple times, in multiple ways, that she had plans. She was allowed to have plans. It wasn’t everyday that her college roommate came into town. She hadn’t seen Tess in way too long. That is why she took the time off, and she never took time off. So when she had reminded Tony, for what was the 5th time in two weeks, and he started to complain with the standard,

“I don’t like it when you have plans. Besides, you never. . .” and it was at this point that his Blackberry screeched from his pocket. He pulled it out and looked at the flashing red text box on the screen.   
PEPPER HAS TIME OFF. . . PEPPER HAS TIME OFF…

“Ah.” He said as he shut off the alarm. “Do I want to know how you did that?”

“Oh probably,” Pepper said sweetly as she turn to walk down the hall.

“You not going to tell me are you?” he called after her.

“Nope.”

But that was last week. And while he had not been any more Tony-like than usual, she had a sneaking suspicion that maybe. . . Pepper didn’t have time to follow through with that train of thought, the past two days had been nothing but putting out fires and she had had enough. She didn’t have time for this, she had to – answer her cell phone.

“This is Pepper.”

“Well of course you are,” came the familiar voice, “I am just wondering where you are, I just got through baggage claim. . .”

“Shit!”

There was a short pause, then a laugh. “You’re still at work aren’t you?”

“Oh Tess I am so sorry! Oh my god! I didn’t realize the time. . .”

“Chill Pep! Having another Stark-tastic day?”

“You have no idea. . .”

“No worries. Tell you what, you finish up with saving the world, or whatever you do there. I’ll take a cab and meet you there. But you do owe me drink though. I’ll see you as soon as I see you.”

“Tess, you are the best!”

“I know!” came the laughing reply as call ended.

And so Pepper, counting the seconds until she walk out the door and have some fun, headed back into the trenches. 

It was after 5 p.m and most of the office was gone. Pepper was still there of course, Tony noted from through the open door of his office. He turned back to his computer, and the open schematic on the screen. It was then that there was, good god, a girly squeal? He looked up to see Pepper mid hug with an unknown woman. He got up from his desk and headed toward the door. 

She was a woman about Pepper’s age, and a looker at that. Tall, athletic looking. . . My god she could be Pepper’s sister! Or cousin. While Pepper’s hair was long and a strawberry blonde, this woman’s was cut, flatteringly, shorter at slightly above shoulder length and a deep auburn. Pepper was just a shade shorter, and a bit slighter of build, but the resemblance was striking. An image flashed through his mind, he gave a small smirk and filed it away for later consideration. They were mid conversation by the time he approached.

“….long flight, but not too horrible. No screaming children thank god.”

“My god you must be starving! Do you need something?”

“No,” the woman said with a small laugh and a shake of her head, “I had breakfast once, and lunch at least twice today. Love the East Coast, West Coast jump.”

Up close Tony noticed that while Pepper usually had a demeanor of calm efficiency, this woman had a bit more of an edge to her, just slightly more intense than Pepper. Interesting. 

“A girly squeal? Really, I expected better of you Potts.” Tony said as he swaggered up to them.

“Oh. Tony, this is my friend, my old college roommate, Tess Morton. Tess, this is my boss Tony Stark.”

“Pepper’s friend.” Tony smiled at her, using one of his GQ smiles.

“Pepper’s boss.” Tess said with a reserved smile. They shook hands. 

Oh, yes, thought Tess, not hard on the eyes at all. I wouldn’t complain over much having to come into work seeing this during the week. Confident, rich, brilliant, oozes charm, indeed highly fuckable. Danger be this way, wearing an Armani suit.  
There followed a short silence Until Tony gave an amused laugh. “Morton?”

“Ye-e-e-s,” Tess said slowly.

“Ha! Salt!” Tony laughed pointing at Tess, then turning “and Pepper!”

“Dammit!” Tess said in mock anger, digging into the front pocket of her jeans and pulling out a folded $20 and placing it into Pepper’s waiting palm. Pepper laughed as she slipped it into her jacket pocket.

“I just missed something. . .” Tony said.

“Standing wager since college,” Tess explained. “If it takes someone longer than 10 minutes to figure out that joke, Pepper pays me.”

“And under ten minutes, Tess pays me,” Pepper finished. “But that was record time. Thanks boss. Tess I have two quick things to take care of then we can get going.”

“Where to?” Tony asked all innocence in Pepper’s direction.

“Out.” Pepper said with a cool smile. “I’ll be just a few minutes.”

“Why don’t you wait in my office?” Tony was all charm.

“Sure,” Tess said easily. Pepper shot her a small questioning look, but she gave a small nod.

Pepper headed down the hall, “I’ll just be a few minutes. Behave!” she shot over her shoulder.

Tess arched her eyebrow and gave Tony a small smile, “Was that for you, or me.”

Tony laughed and headed towards his office door, “I am starting to like you Pepper’s friend.”

“Why thank you Pepper’s boss. But you can call me Tess.”

“Then you can call me Tony. Would you like a drink?”

“No thanks,” Tess said, “Nice view.”   
“Thanks,” Tony said walking over and perching on the edge of his desk. “Take a seat,” he gestured to a chair in front of his desk. 

“No thanks,” Tess said with a shake of her head, “Long flight, I’d rather stand. Tony shrugged. “So, how long have you known Pepper?”

“We were roommates Freshman year until we graduated.”

“Reeeeeeally,” Tony said with interest. He gave a wolfish grin, “Did you braid each others hair?”

“Oh sure,” Tess said returning his smile with an innocent one of her own, “right after the sweaty, half naked pillow fights and kissing practice.”

“Hm,” Tony said staring into space for a moment. He snapped back to the present. “So then you have Pepper in college stories.”

“I do. But I am not inclined to share. . .”

“Oh come on,” Tony wheedled, “I am sure that she has told her share of stories about me.”

“Well, no actually,” Tess said as she rubbed her left eye with the heel of her hand, “she doesn’t really talk much about you.”

“Oh,” Tony said slightly deflated, but he recovered quickly, “but still, I am sure you have dirt.”

Tess blinked, her eye was dry and was starting to burn, it must have been the air on the plane. “Oh I do, but so does Pepper.”

“So?”

“So Pepper has incriminating evidence,” Tess said with a laugh. “Shit.”

“What?” 

“I just lost my contact. Ouch.” Tess pulled her hand away from her face and Tony was surprised to see her eye was bright red and streaming tears.

“Are you ok?” Tony came over to her.

“Yeah,” Tess said running the tip of her finger around the bottom eyelid, “I just can’t find it. It stings like hell.”

“Here,” Tony took her by the shoulders and turned her towards the desk. “Have a seat, let me see if I can find it.”

Tess was about to protest, but up this close, damn. He was good looking, devastatingly handsome would be the term. Granted her left eye wasn’t really working, but her right one did. Nice eyes. With his left hand Tony gently held her head to the side, with his right hand on the side of her face, he used his thumb to gently pull her eyelid down.

Tess wondered if he could actually hear her heart skip. His hands, strong but gentle. Holy shit. Breath, be cool. Out of the corner of her right eye, she could just make out a faint light glowing beneath his red silk tie. Oh, right.

“Look up,” he directed. She did so and the accompanying sharp pain made her flinch. 

“Sorry,” he said quietly and gave her a sheepish grin. That was almost too much for Tess. 

“I think I found it,” Tess felt the pressure from his thumb shift followed by the sliding sensation of the lens starting to move.

“Tony! What the hell?!” Pepper’s voice cracked like a whip from the door.

Dumbfounded Tony and Tess both turned towards the door. But in the split second they both realized what Pepper saw. 

What Pepper saw was Tess pressed against the desk, with Tony’s hands on her face and her eye streaming like she was crying. Oh. Shit.

Tony jumped back like he had been shocked, “What?! Pepper! No, I didn’t!!” There was a note of panic in his voice. Tess just stood there in shock and blinked, and with an ironic stab, her contact slid back into place.

In the mean time, Pepper had spun around and was storming the few short steps to the door. Tony covered the distance from the desk to the door in a few strides. He was fast. Almost not fast enough. Pepper and Tony reached the door at the same moment, then began the slightly ridiculous fight for control of the door. Pepper trying to get out and Tony trying to keep her in.

“You don’t understand. . .” Tony started to say.

“I think I do,” Pepper shot back.

“I didn’t…” the panic in Tony’s voice was a little more pronounced. 

“Oh, but I do!” Pepper’s anger was ramping up into a righteous fury.

“But. . .”  
“I. Don’t. Want. To. Hear. It,” the molten anger in Pepper’s voice scorched even Tess from a few feet away.

And it was in that moment when it happened. Like the JFK assassination, there were plenty of witnesses, but no one would ever be certain as to what really occurred. Whether Pepper lost her grip on the door, or Tony just put more muscle into it than he meant to, the door swung free, and with a dull thunk, hit Pepper squarely in the face. She staggered back a step. There was a terrible silence. Tony took a step back as Pepper brought her hand to her face. Tess was already half way to her when Pepper turned, pulled her hand away, to reveal a stream of blood coming from her nose. The look in her eyes could have incinerated Tony where he stood. Tess felt her body run cold and her stomach drop through the floor.

“Oh god! Pepper,” he said taking a step forward and reached for her.

Pepper belted Tony. It was a good slap, Tess thought. Pepper’s arm flashed out in a tight arc and giving it all she had, the palm of her hand connected neatly with the side of Tony’s face with a meaty smack. Either Tony never saw it coming, or Pepper had enough behind it, but the force knocked him back a step. You could almost hear it echo.

Tony stood, slack jawed, absolute shock plastered across his face. Pepper turned and stalked out, eyes blazing, hand cupping her bleeding nose. Tony was about to start after her, but Tess reached the door, and putting a hand on his should and held him back. He turned to look at her and Tess was surprised to see fear and worry mixing with the shock, she felt a sudden pang of sympathy for him.

“I wouldn’t,” Tess said softly, “I’ll go talk to her.” She paused for a second, “I found my contact. Thanks.” She walked out the door.

It took her a few minutes, as she had no clue as to the lay out of the office, but she found the ladies room eventually and walked in. She heard a small sniff and saw Pepper’s shoes under the stall wall. 

“Pep, are you ok?”

“No,” came the teary reply from the stall. “I just slapped my boss.”

‘I saw. And it was a good one too, by the way. That’s what I call gob smacked.”

There was a small snorting laugh. “I am so fired.”

“I highly doubt that, he couldn’t find his own ass with flash lights in both hands if it wasn’t for you.”

“He. . “ her voice faltered, and there was a soft sob, “he didn’t DO anything did he?” There was a pleading quality to her voice.  
“He was helping me with my contact Pep. It got stuck under my eyelid and I couldn’t find it. It sounds so lame, but it’s the truth.” There was another sob, a bit louder this time, from inside the stall. Tess felt her own throat tighten. “Besides,” Tess went on with forced levity, “Iron Man or not, he would need more than his suit to protect himself if he had.”

Silence filled the room. “You know the last time I cried at work? It was my first day. I called you absolutely convinced that I couldn’t do it.”

Tess gave a wry laugh, “I remember that, it was almost midnight East Coast time. Do you remember what I told you then?”

“Yeah. . .”

“I told you that you were fucking fabulous, and that you could handle anything that they threw at you. You are so not fired.”

“Oh shit. Tony has got to be soooo pissed!” Tess could hear fear and concern in her voice. 

“Actually, it looked like you, well. . .” Tess trailed off, not sure how to finish that statement.

“What!” Pepper demanded. “Tess, please. . .”

“In my opinion, mind you, it looked like you hurt his feelings. And. . .”

“Tess!”

“And. Well look, after all the “Stark-isms” that you shared, which he wanted to know about by the way. I said nothing to incriminate you, don’t worry. After all of your stories, and the whole “I am Iron Man” press conference thing. I think, possibly, that you scared him.” Tess finished flatly. 

“Bullshit! Scare Tony Stark?! He has metal bits floating around his heart for god’s sake! Oh why did I do that?!”

“Well. . .”

“I don’t know why I did it!” Pepper wailed, “Well, yeah I do. It has been one hell of a week. And I was so pissed when I saw you guys, my friend for god’s sake and he just had to try. . .and it looked like you were crying,” Pepper was starting to babble a bit, “and then the door, and I saw the blood, and it really fucking hurt!” Pepper finished indignantly. 

“How’s your nose? Do you think it’s broken?”  
“No. It stopped bleeding pretty quickly.”

“Well then, let’s go find your boss, get everything sorted, then go get nicely drunk. We both deserve it. Plus you get to buy the first round with my $20.”

There was a slightly muffled laugh, a flush and Pepper emerged. He nose was slightly red, though she had cleaned off the blood, and her eyes were a bit glassy, but all in all not horrible. Pepper looked at her self in the mirror and gave a laugh. 

“I look like hell.”

“Yup.”

“Thanks a lot Tess!”

“I’m just here to help.”

They headed out of the ladies room and back towards Tony’s office.

“I gotta say Pep, your boss. Damn he is a fine, fine man. How do you do it? Or not as is the case.”

“You haven’t seen the things I have.” Pepper said shooting her friend a look that said volumes about the levels of irresponsible, consequence free debauchery witnessed over the years. “You don’t want to know. There is a reason I am well paid. . .”

Tess laughed. “I shudder to think. No seriously, I shudder! You know how vivid my imagination is. Let’s go patch things up with Lord Byron.”

“What?”

“Mary Shelly once said of Lord Byron the he was ‘mad, bad, and dangerous to know’.”

Pepper considered this for a moment. “Yeah, that’s him in a nut shell.”

“Oh by the way,” Tess said in an offhand manner, “I told him that we had half naked pillow fights and practiced kissing on each other.”

Pepper gave Tess a shove, “Dammit, I will not hear the end of it. I swear, I will hear him THINKING about it. . .” she trailed off, looked at Tess and they both gave a lascivious laugh.

The door to Tony’s office was closed, and as Pepper raised her hand to knock she could feel her heart pounding in her throat. That instant of blinding rage and hurt replayed in her head, and she could feel the sting of his face burn in her palm. She wanted to cry, she wanted to run. She wanted Tess to stop staring holes in the back of her head, making sure that she would go through with it. She knocked. There was no answer. She turned to walk, run, away only to see Tess leaning against the wall by the elevator shaking her head and pointing to the door. 

Oh god, oh god, oh god. She turned back, took a deep breath and opened the door. The lights were off. “Tony?” Pepper called cautiously. There was no answer. “Tony?” louder this time. Still no answer. Pepper turned back to Tess, shook her head with a shrug and closed the door behind her.

Tess had given Pepper her phone back after midnight. 

“For the love of god! If he was going to fire you by phone call or text he would have done it by now,” she said angrily after Pepper had checked her phone for the hundredth time at dinner. “I will put it on vibrate, and if it’s him I will give you the phone back.” Tess didn’t need to give Pepper her phone back at all that evening.

So here they were in the back of a cab after 2:30 in the morning, nicely buzzed, and laughing like they hadn’t since college. They were just turning into the driveway at Pepper’s tiny but fantastic bungalow, when the taxi’s headlights swept across a silver Audi sports car parked at a drunken angle. The license said Stark4. The door was open, but there was no one behind the wheel. Tess heard Pepper suck in a sharp breath. Tess threw some cash at the driver and both she and Pepper bolted from the cab. Both were dressed for the bar, in trendy jeans, killer heels (sex kitten heels as they had called them in college), Tess in a tank top (65 is NOT cold) and Pepper in a v-neck top that had almost every male in the bar ogling. 

They both ran as fast as their shoes allowed, both arriving at the car within seconds of each. The keys were still in the ignition. 

“Shit!” Pepper breathed tensely. She reached in with a slightly trembling hand and pulled the key out of the ignition.

“No kidding” Tess said coming up with a near empty bottle of scotch from the floor of the passenger side. She didn’t recognize the name, but by the smell she knew that the bottle probably cost more than her rent payment. She put her hand on the hood. “It’s still warm, he can’t have been here too long.”

They both looked around the small driveway and almost nonexistent front yard. They didn’t see Tony, or even a Tony shaped lump anywhere. 

“Pepper!” Tess called as she pointed to the front door. There in the shadows thrown by the porch light was a crumpled form, a dull round glow visible from where the chest should be. Pepper sprinted towards the door. Tess paused for a moment stripped off her shoes, then ran full speed after her friend. When she got there Pepper was already bending over the sprawled form.   
“Oh Tony,” Pepper whispered. It panged Tess to hear the despair in her friend’s voice. Even from about a foot away, the wave of scotch hit Tess like she had walked into a wall. 

“Jesus! What he’d do? Swim in the stuff?” 

As Tess got closer she could see that while he was still wearing the suit from earlier, both the jacket and tie were missing. His shirt was open at the neck, the cuffs missing their links were open and one sleeve was pushed up almost to the elbow. There were multiple light brown stains on the front of the shirt, and Tess really hoped it was spilled scotch that was providing the boozey atmosphere that surrounded the apparently unconscious man. But she doubted it.

“Tony!” Pepper was shaking him by the shoulder. Tony’s head was tilted back and rested against the doorjamb. Tess squatted down by his side and felt for a pulse. There was one, strong and steady. She let out the breath that she had been holding. 

They looked at each other. “What do we do,” they asked each other at the same time.

“Ladies!” the voice came as a surprise and made them jump. 

There was a slight slur, but he sounded more sober than he had any right to be. Tony’s eyes snapped open, and he rolled his head up to give both a slightly lopsided grin. His eyes were red and glassy, and they both suspected that he was having a hard time figuring out how many of them there were, and which ones he should be talking to. 

“Did you have,” Tony tilted his head and squinted, he chose the Pepper in the middle, “have a, ah, good. . .” he lost his train of thought. Tony stared into space for a moment, then he focused, more or less, on Tess. “Peppersh friend!’ he said happily. 

“Got it in one. How long have you been here Tony?” 

He ignored her question, tilted his head and tried to focus. “Wheresh. . .P-Pepper?”

“Right here Tony.”

His head rolled to the other side, squinted, and gave a sheepish grin. “Hi.”

“Hi. How much did you drink Tony?”

“Just one. . .and a half. . .”

“Cases maybe,” Tess muttered.   
Tony heard her apparently, cause he shook his head sloppily, “Noooooo,” He drawled. “Bottlesh. . .”

Tess looked at the bottle she had put on the ground near the door. She and Pepper stated at each other in disbelief, and all the while Tony had a stupid drunken grin plastered on his face. You could almost hear him slosh.

There was silence. It must have looked strange, Tess pondered, two grown women dressed for a night out, one not wearing shoes, crouched over a man who was so drunk he couldn’t stand, and who didn’t even have the common decency to be unconscious. But, he could buy the entire neighborhood. Sometimes life made her brain hurt. She gave a shiver, it had gotten colder.

“Well,” Pepper said in a resigned voice, “I guess we should get him inside. Help me get him up.”

“Are we going shomewhere?” Tony asked as they hauled him to his feet. It was like trying to lift a bag of sand. His knees kept buckling, but they were eventually able to get him to support his own weight long enough for them both to get a shoulder under each armpit. Pepper managed to fish out her door key, open the door, and by pushing, pulling and dragging, get Tony through the door.

“Crap! I gotta shut of the alarm! Can you hold him?”

“We’ll find out.” Tess said. She grabbed a hold of Tony’s belt and turned him to face her. Pepper stepped away and he sagged suddenly. To keep him from falling, and taking her with him, Tess wrapped both of her arms around his waist and heaved. He gave a lurch and they ended up in an awkward hug with Tess supporting most of his weight. Christ he was heavy for a guy with no body fat. His head dropped to her shoulder. Tess gave a small chuckle, she was in a position that most women would seriously kill for. She couldn’t say she minded horribly having him in a clinch, oh if only in a different time and place! He sagged again. She slapped him on his shoulder, a nicely muscled shoulder, hard.

“Tony!” Tess said loudly into his ear. She noticed that he was sweating slightly, was he sweating scotch? Probably. “Stay awake. I can’t hold you if you don’t”

“Kay.” Came the reply from her shoulder. A pause. “You smell nice. Very pretty.”

“Uh, thanks. You smell like scotch.”

Another pause. “Ish Pepper mad at me?” The question caught her off guard. He sounded – what? Like a kid who was in trouble. She would have laughed if it wasn’t so damn sad. “I don’t like it when Peppersh mad at me.”   
If he tried harder he couldn’t twist the emotional screw further. Well, there went her nice buzz. He was starting to slip and her arms were screaming. Tess wasn’t sure how much longer she could hold him up. 

“Little help here Pep!” Tess called.

“I’m coming!” came the reply, accompanied by the sound of bare feet on floorboards.

“Pepper.” Tony mumbled. He lifted his head and she could see his red glassy eyes starting to water. Oh crap, was he going to cry? Pepper was rounding the corner, but he was still looking at her. 

Tess gave a half smile, “No. She’s not made at you.” She whispered. She saw hope spring to life in his eyes for a second, only to die screaming on his drunken brain. 

“But. ..” Before he could finish Pepper and arrived.

“Having a good chat?” She attempted a light tone, but couldn’t manage it convincingly. 

“Oh sure,” Tess said wryly, “solving the world’s woes,” once again each took an arm and manhandled, literally, him through the front hallway.

“So does this happen often?” Tess shot Pepper a concerned look over the back of Tony’s hanging head. 

“This has never happened Tess. I’ve never seen him this way. I didn’t even think he knew where I lived.” Her tone worried Tess.

“The joys of GPS. You can’t tell me you’ve never seen him drunk.”

“Oh sure. Buzzed, drunk, hammered, giddy, sloshed, bombed, even three sheets to the wind. But I have never, never, seen him this fall down, blackout, out of control, stupid drunk.”

“Shit.” They had reached the living room and stopped just short of an armchair. “Well, what do you want to do?”

“I’m, I’m not sure. Take him to the hospital?”

“We could do that,” Tess pondered aloud. “I am not sure how close he is to alcohol poisoning. . .”

“No. . .” Tony slurred, “No hosh. . . “

“You heard the man. Tony, have you puked yet?” Tess asked.

“No. . . Shorry about the bushes Pepper, I threw up in them.”

“Right,” Tess though for another moment, “Well, ok, he’s not dead yet. How he drove here I really don’t want to know.”

“I haven’t heard any sirens yet,” Pepper said looking over her shoulder at the door.

“So. We can put him back in the car and let him sleep it off there. . .”

“No.”

“Ok. Does he have anyone to. . .” Tess trailed off seeing the look on Pepper’s face. “which would be you. Huh.”

“I’m not willing to call and wake Happy up to come and get him either,” Pepper said firmly.

“Or we can put him on the couch, on his stomach, so he doesn’t drown in a pool of his own vomit.”

“Real nice Tess!”

“Sorry, Pep. But I’m tired and he’s getting really heavy.”

Drunk strength, especially that of a seasoned veteran such as Tony, never ceases to amaze. It was like someone flipped a switch. Tony found his footing, stepped away, turned to face them and stood swaying slightly. 

“I’m fine.” Tony stood staring off into space for a moment then he looked at Pepper and took a step towards her.

“I didn’t mean to. . .” he started, stopped, and looked from Pepper to Tess , then back to Pepper. “I was,” he faltered as he took another step towards Pepper. She stood stock still, worried. Tony reached out and gently took a hold of her wrist. He started to shake. “I. . .She. . . I. . .her eye was lost in her contact. . . I was helping. . . didn’t mean to… hurt you… with the door. . .” his voice cracked. And to the shock and disbelief of Tess, and especially Pepper, he sank to his knees and put his face against her stomach, wrapped his arms around her waist and started to cry. Honest to god cry. 

Pepper and Tess stared at each other wide-eyed and speechless. 

“Don’t go. . . please. . . please. . . don’t leave. . .I…” but the rest was lost in his wracking sobs. At a loss at what to do, Pepper put a hand on his head and gently stroked his hair, she rubbed his shaking shoulder with the other. This unfortunately made him cry harder for about a minute. 

“Um. I’m not going anywhere Tony. It’s, uh, it will, um, be ok?” Pepper looked over at Tess, Help me, Pepper mouthed silently, but Tess shrugged in bewilderment.

“Sorry. . .so sorry. . . don’t go. . .” 

“Tony,” Pepper said in her voice that got things done, “stop crying. I am not leaving, so, for the love of god, stop. Please.”

“Very forceful Pep. Especially the please.”

Pepper gritted her teeth and shot daggers at Tess. Her body was shaking as Tony sobbed on her. “Then you tell me what you are supposed to say to a drunken, crying billionaire, cause I am at a loss here.” She looked pained as she stared down at him. 

Another awkward few minutes passed. Tony’s sob eventually slowed, and turned into hiccups. After a few shuddering gulps there was a wet snort, and Pepper flinched.

Pepper and Tess exchanged slightly disgusted looks. 

“Did he just,” Tess paused searching for the right word, “snot on you?”

“Um, I think so,” Pepper said slightly horrified.

“Eeewww.” They said together.

“I’ll, um, go get you a towel.” 

“Yes please. There are some in the kitchen. Hurry.” There was a slight shill pitch in Pepper’s voice as she said this.

Tess padded quickly out to the kitchen. Pepper could hear her opening drawers, then the water in the sink running. In the mean time Tony’s grip loosened and he leaned back on his heels. He wiped his face on his sleeve with a wet “snork”, but he wouldn’t look at her.

“Sorry,” he mumbled. “I would never. . .” he gave a strained cough, “hurt you like that. But I had to tell,” another cough and Pepper saw a drop of fluid, I’ll just pretend that’s a tear she though, hit his sleeve. “It wasn’t. . .don’t leave me. . .”

It was like being stabbed, thought Pepper, only you can’t see the blood, or the knife for that matter. She kneeled in front of Tony, their knees touching slightly. Another unsteady breath, and with a speed she didn’t think possible, threw his arms around her shoulders, pulling her forward, and buried his face in her neck. He gave a huge sob, and Pepper could feel hot liquid ooze onto her neck. Gross, don’t think about it Potts! But fortunately Tony only had one sob left before they fell into an awkward silence. Pepper put her arms around him loosely. “I’m sorry that I slapped you,” she said quietly, “I didn’t mean it, not really,” She fought down the swell of tears that threatened her. Why? Why did her life have moments like this? This was not normal. All she wanted was to spend time with her friend, someone who she didn’t have to be on guard from every second. And now her boss decides to go and have himself a little breakdown. Fucking hell.

God he reeked of booze, and sweat, but underneath was his cologne. The cologne, that when he wore it, Pepper had to concentrate on anything and everything but him. She didn’t think he knew that it had that affect on her, because she was sure that if he did he would wear it all the time just to get under her skin. She was only human after all. She closed her eyes and rested her cheek against the top of his head. What the hell she though, why can’t I just this once not worry? She tightened her grip on him, and was it her imagination, but did he pull her just a fraction closer? 

Pepper ran her hands up and down his back, feeling the flex of the muscles in his back and shoulders. As Tony took a deep breath, Pepper could feel the hard curved edge of the arc reactor press slightly into her breast. She could hear him breathing, hear her pulse pounding in her ears, the fact the sink was now turned off and that Tess was walking up the hall. Pepper dropped her arms to her sides. Turning her head slightly, she could see Tess enter the room, a wet dishtowel in her hand.

“You ok?” Tess asked softly as she walked over to stand next to Pepper.

“No. But . . .” Pepper trailed off. With a sigh, she put both of her hands on Tony’s shoulders and started to push him away. There was a second where he resisted letting go, but Pepper rocked him back on his heels. He wouldn’t look at either of them. 

Tess dropped to her haunches and handed Pepper the cold damp towel. 

“Tony.” Pepper said quietly, “It’s ok. Tony?”

He finally looked up, and frankly he looked like hell. His eyes had a thick, glazed look and were red, his face was almost a purple and streaked with tears and snot. Pepper reached forward and wiped his face with the towel. She gave a few more swipes before sitting back. He looked slightly better, while his face was still splotchy it was at least cleaned up a bit. Tony Stark may be ridiculously wealthy, a mechanical genius, and a newly minted “hero” to boot, but you can’t take anyone, not even him, seriously with snot dripping from his nose. 

Pepper refolded the towel so there was a clean side and gave a scrub to her neck with a grimace. She suddenly felt very, very tired, and rubbed her eyes with he free hand.   
“What time is it Tess?”

“After 3.”

“How are you not falling over?”

“Practice. Come on, lets get him settled on the couch, we both need sleep.”

The both got up slowly, and with an arm under each of Tony’s, they hauled him to his feet. Nearly. The three of them staggered dangerously for a moment before Pepper and Tess were able to steady themselves.

“It’s almost like wrestling with scotch flavored Silly Putty,” commented Tess as they made their unsteady way to the couch. They turned themselves around and sat down heavily, Tony falling between them. They sat for a moment before Pepper found the energy to stand. She looked down at the snail trails of Stark snark streaked on her shirt.

“Ug.”

“Put it on his tab,” Tess said with a wicked grin.

“Can you watch him for a second? I want to get a clean shirt and grab a pillow and blanket. And a bucket.”

Tess nodded, “Sure. I got this. No rush,” she looked at Tony as he sat very still with his head resting against the back of the couch, “I don’t think he will be going anywhere soon.”

As Pepper headed up stairs, Tess stood up and stretched. 

“Well Tony,” Tess said conversationally, “How does it feel being the drunkest human being on the face of the planet?”

“Like I need a drink,” came the answer.

“Sure,” Tess said pleasantly, “why the hell not?” She went to the kitchen and came back with a bottle of water from the fridge, cracked it open and handed it out to Tony.

“What ish it?” he asked suspiciously opening an eye a fraction.

“Vodka, but if you don’t want any. . .” she started to pull it back when he reached for it. It took him a moment to close his hand around it.

Tony forced himself to sit up slightly and took a tentative sip. It doshn’t taste like v-voddka,” he said suspiciously. 

“What does it taste like?” Tess asked amused.  
“Gin.”

“Yup you got me, it’s gin.” Tess said, watching Tony chug the water. It was gone in under 30 seconds. Tess tugged the empty bottle from his hand. When he hadn’t moved for about a minute, she bent down and started taking off his shoes and socks. When that was done with no lasting trauma to either one, Tess looked at his still form.

His shirt was disgusting, soaked with whatever liquids had been spilled over this long evening. Tess made a quick executive decision. She undid a few buttons, then shook Tony, none too gently, it had been a long day.  
“Tony, help me with your shirt.”

“Wha…”

“Sit up for a second.” 

He made an attempt to sit up, failed, and with a sigh Tess pulled him forward with one hand, and with the other grabbed the tail of his shirt and pulled it halfway up his back. “Arms up.” Tony complied to the best of his ability, it chaffed Tess a bit that he giggled as she tugged his shirt off over his head. 

“Oh, huh.” Tess said. Tony was wearing a tank top undershirt, and there, burning with white light beneath it, was the arc reactor. She couldn’t help but stare, it was just so incongruous seeing something so mechanical in a guy who, not more than fifteen minutes ago, was snotting all over her friend. 

Tony followed her gaze, “Yeah. Wanna touch it?”

“That sounded less creepy in your head didn’t it?”

“Kinda,” Tony leaned his head back for a moment and started to slide to his left. Tess gave a sigh and wrangled Tony until he was laying on his side. Tony rolled onto his back and opened a bloodshot eye. “So wanna see or not?”

When will I get another change thought Tess. “Ok.” Sitting on the edge of the couch, she hooked a finger on the neck of his shirt and pulled it down about an inch exposing the edge. It was strange that the seam between the skin and the metal of the reactors edge didn’t look as awful as she had though it would.

“Pepper’s friend,” Tony laughed, “Don’t be shy. Here” He pulled his shirt up exposing, Tess had to admit, rock hard abs and the whole reactor. “Tah dah.” He closed his eyes and laughed. 

Tess peered closer. The technology that was at work, it was mind-boggling. It fit so well in his body, almost like a healed extreme body piercing. “Wow”  
“That’s what they all say,” Tony said as he arched an eyebrow at her suggestively, or as close as he could manage in his heavily inebriated state, “the ladies all love the arc reactor.”

Tess laughed, she couldn’t help it, this guy was unreal. He had consumed enough scotch to kill an entire frat house, yet he was still making jokes and attempting to flirt with her. Without thinking she tapped the center of the reactor, it was warm and smooth, it felt like glass. Suddenly she realized what she had done.

“Oops, um sorry about that. That didn’t hurt did it?”

Tony shook his head, his eyes closed. “It only hurt when it happened. And when Pepper had to help change it out. . .”

“What?!”

“Dainty hands. She hand to reach in and touch my heart. . .Connect the wire. . .”

“She never told me that.” Tess ran a finger around the outer edge, where the metal met skin. Seamless, amazing, it was a part of him. . .

Tony shivered, “Tickles. . .” he mumbled.

“What does it feel like?”

“Like a chunk of metal shoved into my chest.”

“Everything ok Tess?” Pepper said from behind them.

Tony’s eyes snapped open, and a look of desperation flashed across his face, “Pepper! I didn’t. . . I was just showing,” he pulled his shirt back down and put his hand over the reactor in what almost looked like embarrassed modesty. “The reactor. . .cause. . .cause. . .” he gulped hard, “I’m Iron Man. . .” He finished weakly. “Plus, plus,” he said as if struck by a sudden thought, “I’m too drunk to get it up, probably, so. . . so we couldn’t anyway, but. . .cause see, I’m Iron Man. . .” Tony stopped confused.

Pepper and Tess looked at each other then looked away quickly. Tess shut her eyes tight and shook with silent laughter. Pepper bit her bottom lip, hard, and swallowed back the laugh that threatened. She coughed. “Yes. So I’ve been told.” 

“Roll onto your side,” she said. When he complied, she helped him put the pillow under his head and covered him with the blanket. She put a plastic bucked near his head on the floor. “Try to aim.” was all she said, but she quickly and softly ran her hand over his hair. 

Pepper and Tess headed up the stairs. He heard them go, but the black sticky darkness flowed up and pulled him under.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tess gets pancakes, Pepper gets a day off, and Tony gets taken for a ride

Pounding. A thudding and voices. They sounded far away. Ok. He was face down somewhere. He thought about opening his eyes, but one was already open so no extra work was required there. But, interesting, everything was blurry. Blinking might help, but he wasn’t sure that he could manage, so he would do it later. Voices again, closer now. What were they talking about? It didn’t matter.

So, a system check. Hearing and vision, check. It felt like all the extremities were there, so really did he actually have to move them? So he was all there, sort of. God, it felt like he had been crushed by something very heavy, or dragged, by the way his arms and shoulders felt. But his skull, and all of its contents, throbbed and ached. 

But where was he? Somewhere relatively comfortable. With a bucket? Ok. A bucket and there was a patterned rug. Ah-ha! He was face down on a couch, but not his couch, not his house. It didn’t feel like there was anyone with him. Alone on a couch somewhere. Then a voice that he recognized, a voice he would know anywhere was talking, but not to him.

“I can’t believe you are up this early, it’s not even 7 yet,” said the voice of Pepper.

“I could say the same for you. My body clock is all screwed up now, it feels like it’s later for me.” Hm, that voice wasn’t unfamiliar. It continued. “So at least I have an excuse.”

“I’m usually up before this, so I just woke up.”

“Yeah but it’s your day off. It was a long day yesterday, why not get some more sleep?”

“I will. But you should take your own advice. Also I wanted to check on. . .” Pepper’s voice trailed off. 

“He’s ok. I checked on him a bit ago,” the voices where getting closer, but then they got softer as if they didn’t want to disturb someone.

“Is he awake?” asked Pepper in a low voice, “his eyes are open.”

“No, just the one. It’s been like that for awhile.”

Were they talking about him? Maybe. So he was at Pepper’s house? How the hell did he get here? Why was. . . Images of the previous hours started to swim to the surface. Ok, Pepper’s college friend. . . Tess. . .

“Thanks so much for everything you did last night Tess. I’m sorry. . .” 

Why did he know that she wore perfume, and contact lenses? 

“It’s ok Pep. I feel like the whole mess is my fault. It was a rough night. . .”

Was Pepper ok? She sounded ok, but why did he think. . . 

“It was just very strange. . .”

Oh. 

Oh no. 

“. . .We’ll have more fun before you go home I promise.”

“Just as long as you are ok. Um, are you going to talk to him about?..”

He heard soft footsteps. More images resurfaced with a vengeance. Then he saw the blurred form of Pepper standing over him. 

Oh. Holy. Fuck. 

Panic flooded him. There was a millisecond where he seriously considered making a run for it, but that would only end in failure on an epic scale. Best plan was to play dead. 

He felt Pepper’s hand on the side of his face. She slid two fingers under his jaw and felt for a pulse. It took everything he had not move, to stay relaxed. Pepper felt his pulse for a moment then pulled her hand away. He could feel her staring at him, and the pounding in his head increased. She started to move away, and he started to relax a bit, but then he felt her run her fingers lightly through his hair and something twisted him up inside. She moved away. 

“Ok, I’m going to get some more sleep. We can figure out what to do later. You should try to get some more sleep to Tess.” 

“I will in just a bit,” Tess assured her. 

He heard Pepper go upstairs and a door closed somewhere. Ok. He had to get up. He had to go. But did he drive here? Where were his keys? Where. . . 

“You can stop pretending to be asleep now,” Tess said in a quiet voice from somewhere not far away.

Tony, with some effort blinked, and there was a slight sucking sound as he did so. His vision cleared somewhat and he saw Tess in a pair of black pajama bottoms and an old Smashing Pumpkins concert t-shirt sitting in an armchair a few feet away. He rolled onto his side, but as he did so, the room spun violently. Right. A hangover. That’s what this was, hadn’t had one in awhile and was out of practice. He shut his eyes and waited for things to stop moving.

“Nnngghh,” was all he could manage.

“I would advise you to give up your plan for making a break for it.”

Tony opened his eyes and stared at Tess in disbelief, how the hell did she know that?

“First of all, you’re still drunk, so I doubt you could get very far. Second, I don’t know where Pepper put your car keys, and even if I did I wouldn’t let you drive in your state. And third,” here Tess paused and gave a small smile, “don’t ask me how you managed this, but you took your pants off some time last night, and I can’t seem to find them.”

Tony reached a hand under the blanket. Yeah. No pants. When the hell?

“Look, I don’t know how much you remember. . .”

“Enough,” Tony groaned.

“Right. Well, I suggest that you get some more sleep, and then you and Pepper can have a quiet chat. I am sure that you will both agree to file this away in the drawer marked ‘things we will never speak of again’. Which I have no doubt is overflowing by this point.” Tess stood up. “I am going back to bed for a few hours, I hope.”

Tess headed out of the room, but stopped at the door and turned. “But if I may make a suggestion. I think an apology while sober-ish would be a good idea. Oh, and I’m glad you didn’t die on the couch. That would have been awkward.” 

Tony watched her go. He rolled onto his back and felt the world slosh. Right. So while he couldn’t recall how big of an ass he made of himself a few hours ago, there was a sinking feeling that it was not his most stellar moment. But he had apologized for hitting Pepper with the door. The image of her with blood streaming down her face burned behind his eyes. That was an awful moment, but he couldn’t decide if it was better or worse than when she had slapped him. Tony was no stranger to being slapped by beautiful and angry women, or have drinks thrown at him for that matter. He had gotten better at avoiding both in the past decade but he never saw that one coming. 

Tony probed his jaw, a bit tender but not bad. Pepper put something behind that one. He was impressed actually that she hadn’t just crumbled and apologized the second after that. But that wasn’t his Pepper. That was why he wasn’t angry. It just had, what. . . It was a feeling that he wasn’t sure he wanted to admit to, call it shock? Yeah that would work.

Tess was right that being sober, sort of, and apologizing again might be a good thing to do. There was something nagging at him though, something that he should feel, uh, embarrassed about? Was it having to be carried inside? No he remembered that, and Tess had... Ah! He remembered her holding him up, too bad he hadn’t been aware enough to enjoy that. But then, something else, what? So he had apologized, but had he said something else he shouldn’t have? He hadn’t been that obliterated in quite sometime, and the hangover, which he deserved no question there, was making it difficult. He wanted to sleep, he wanted to get out of here, he wanted to find his pants.

Tony laid an arm across his chest and felt the arc reactor under his forearm. Then it hit him. Oh god, he had let Tess look at it, he had pulled up his shirt and let her touch the damn thing! Then Pepper had come in and he had, what, panicked? He then said. . .The memory was eluding him, something about being Iron Man. Was that it? No, there was some else, something before that. A tactile memory surfaced. Someone holding him, not Tess. . .Oh screaming Jesus in a centrifuge. He remembered kneeling, remembered Pepper saying something, she was in front of him and he had reached out and. . .Oh god, he had hugged her. Not just hugged, but grabbed, and not in a manly way. That was it!

That had to be it. She had comforted him when he had hugged her, he remembered the feel of her hands on his back. Huh. Well that wasn’t so horrible, not really anyway. He had had a drunken moment, well another one anyway. For future reference a bottle and a half of scotch was indeed too much. Wow, he hadn’t been that drunk since college. Maybe he was getting old, losing his edge. He had been so gone that he had crossed that self imposed line. The line they both firmly toed. It could have been worse he though as he started to drift. He could have done something really embarrassing like, hells bells, crying. He cringed with that thought. He would have to commit ritual suicide if that ever happened. But this, he could handle this. But something nagged at him, something he couldn’t place. It worried him slightly that he couldn’t really remember, but, he assured himself as sleep claimed him, at least he hadn’t cried. . . 

It was later. How much later Tony couldn’t tell exactly, but long enough to make it hurt more. If that was possible. It was as if someone had sanded the inside of his skull, and not with fine grit sandpaper either. He stared at the ceiling for a moment then made a decision. He had to get up, not wanted to, had to. 

Tony rolled onto his side, then off the couch. He stayed on his hands and knees for a moment and pondered if he should take moment to find his pants. No, he didn’t really have a moment. At least he was wearing underwear. It’s the small details that mean the most sometimes. He crawled a few feet till he reached the armchair, then pulled himself almost completely upright. So. If Pepper had a bathroom where would it be? Upstairs would be the best bet.  
He weaved to the stairs, and paused for a moment looking up. Aw fuck, stairs. He sighed. It couldn’t be helped. With a white knuckled grip on the banister he started up. There were a few times where he had to put his free hand on the tread of the stair above to not fall, but he made it in one piece. At the top of the stairs he looked around. There was an open door on his left, but it didn’t look like a bathroom. He turned to his right three doors all closed. He chose the one in the middle. 

Tony took the few steps over, put his hand on the doorknob and was about to turn it, when the door was ripped from his grasp. It swung inward and Pepper walked out. She collided with him, hard, their skulls cracking together.

“Shit!” Pepper cried as she jumped back stunned, rubbing her forehead. “What the fu. . . Oh shit, Tony. You ok?”

Tony stood swaying, rubbing his right eyebrow. Pain was bouncing around his skull. “Christ Pepper, a little warning might be nice. . .” he trailed off. It was an odd moment to realize that he was standing in nothing more than his boxer briefs and a tank top while Pepper was in a robe with wet hair, a towel in her hand. It was a pink robe with sheep on it. Sheep? Seriously?

The fact that Pepper had seen him in his skivvies before, and quite a few times in even less while “entertaining” flashed through both of their minds at the same time. But this time it just seemed awkward. For Pepper it was because she was sure that he had been wearing pants just a few hours before, coupled with the fact that she had seen him cry. Oh and by the way she was only wearing a robe. And it was the robe he grandmother had gotten her for Christmas many years before. It was ugly, it was pink, it was covered in sheep. White fluffy sheep with little blue ribbons. A girly version of the Brooks Brothers sheep. And oh so unsexy. But really who plans on wearing something sexy to the shower just because there is a drunk billionaire on the couch downstairs?

For Tony it was because he was pretty sure that he had made it very apparent that he was a colossal ass, plus the fact that Pepper had just very obviously gotten out of the shower. And her robe was, well, clinging. 

“Lucky sheep.” Tony muttered.

“What?”

“What?” They looked at each other stupidly for a moment. 

“Uh, bathroom?” Tony asked pointing behind Pepper.

“Yeah, right. I’ll just. . .”

“Ok, so I’ll. . .” Then began the dance of each trying to get out of each others way by going in the same direction a few times. But they eventually got everything sorted. Pepper making her escape to her bedroom and Tony into the bathroom and closing the door a bit harder than was necessary behind him.

After a few moments Tony stood pondering the eternal questions that lies at the root of most strife between the sexes. Should he leave the seat up or not? Now considering the past few hours, he probably shouldn’t leave the seat up. He was brutally hung over and the last thing he needed to do was give Pepper more things to be pissed, oh ha ha, at him for. If no one found out about it his man card status would not be in jeopardy. So he flipped the seat down and flushed. The sound sent pain searing through him. 

And because he knew he wouldn’t get another chance, he snooped. There was a travel kit that had to be Tess’s. It had the standard stuff, plus contact solution, and a small bottle of perfume. He picked it up and sniffed, it smelled familiar. Hm. Tony put the bottle back and turned to the medicine cabinet. Part of him knew that he shouldn’t, he really shouldn’t. But when had that ever stopped him from doing anything? He really wanted know. His hand was on the door when there was a knock,

“Are you almost done in there Pep? I gotta piss like a racehorse.” Tess said through the door.

Tony was about to open the bathroom door with a smirk, until he once again realized he was in his underwear. Why the hell had he taken his pants off? And for that matter why hadn’t he stopped at the first bottle of scotch? Regret? He was getting old. There was another knock and the pain sheared through his brain. He opened the door to find Tess standing in front of the door lightly bouncing from foot to foot. He had to give her credit, there was only a moment of surprise that crossed her face when she realized who had been in the bathroom. She was wearing glasses, Tony noticed, they made her look like a sexy librarian. 

She cocked an eyebrow at him, “Pepper’s boss.”

“Pepper’s friend,” he replied as he passed by her and made his unsteady way back down stairs. 

Not a bad thing to see first thing in the morning, Tess thought to herself with a smile as she walked into the bathroom. 

Tony made it down the stairs without falling, which he was rather proud of himself for. Ok, first find his pants, then his keys, then he could. . . Was that coffee? He turned and saw Pepper in the kitchen standing at the counter looking out the kitchen window. There were three coffee cups lined up by the coffee maker. She was dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, but her feet were bare. So that was what she looked like when she wasn’t at work. It was funny, whenever he thought about Pepper, not that he really THOUGHT thought about her. Ok maybe sometimes if he was bored and there wasn’t anything good on TV, or if it was a Tuesday. Tess had mentioned pillow fights. . . It’s just when someone said, “Oh Pepper will be setting up that meeting,” or one of the hundred million other things that she did, in the mental image conjured up she was always wearing one of her impeccable suits.

And here he was, no pants, standing in her hallway after crashing into her evening with her friend. Something stabbed him inside. Yes, it very well could be his liver screaming as more of it shriveled away, but it was probably guilt. Wow, didn’t know that there was any of that left. So Tony crept by the kitchen door back into the living and started the search for his pants. He pulled up the blanket, no. Under the pillow? No. He walked around the couch, nothing. Barely suppressing a groan, Tony got onto his hands and knees and started rooting around under the couch.

“Still can’t find your pants?” asked Tess from the doorway. 

Startled, Tony stood up quickly, a rookie mistake. The horizontal plane shifted, he’s tossed into free fall for a moment before gravity grabbed his stomach and pulled him to the floor. The edges of his vision dim and he can taste acrid bile. No, he will not puke, he will not puke. Cold sweat prickles his skin.

“Breath. Take it easy.” Tess is close. She is calm, “Unclench Tony.”

It takes Tony a minute to realize that he is in the fetal position on the floor, jaw clenched and hands balled into fists. Tess is on her haunches an arms length away, but she is not touching him. It takes a moment but Tony is able to make himself relax. He rolls onto his back and finds himself staring up at Tess. 

“Nod if you are ok-ish.”

Nod.

“Out of practice?”

Nod.

“That was a total rookie move, you know that right?”

Nod. From his vantage point on the floor, Tony saw a corner of his belt buckle peeking out from under the couch cushion.

“Oh hey. . .pants.” He reached up and gave a weak tug, freeing a crumpled ball of Armani from the couch. He hugged them to his chest and tried to sit up.

Tess put a supportive hand on his back that prevents him from tipping backwards, and Tony makes the painful transition from floor to couch. Bent almost double on the couch, sweating and trying hard not to vomit, a fleeting though of, this can’t get any worse, enters his mind. This is, of course, when Pepper walks in.  
“Are you ok? The bucket is on your right,” the concern in her voice twists him up even more. The slap was nothing compared to how this hurts.

“Yeah,” Tony says through gritted teeth, “Found pants. Need keys.”

“Hell no,” the stereo effect of both Tess and Pepper was like flossing with barbed wire through his nose. Why did they have to care? This was why he used to sleep with shallow women. Wait. Used to? 

“I’m fine,” Tony attempted to sound pissed, to sound confident. But he knew, as he struggled to put wrinkled pants on that they weren’t convince. He could almost hear them thinking at each other. He struggled to force his leg into the pants. One in, ok the next, fine. He pulled them up to his knees. All he had to do was stand up, zip them and he would leave. Hell he’d drive home barefoot, he just wanted to stop feeling like this. He closed his eyes and stood up, swayed but didn’t fall, pulled his pants the rest of the way up and zipped them.

“Ok,” Pepper said evenly. But he knew that tone, it was the tone she used when she was about to shoot him down in flames. “I’ll give you the keys, if you can do a field sobriety test. Right here, right now.”

“What?”

“It’s either that,” Pepper said narrowing her eyes dangerously, “Or you can try to take the keys from me,” she shook that at him teasingly. 

“And then you’d have to get past me,” Tess said sweetly from where she was sitting on the arm of the couch. “Your choice brother.”

They had him by the balls and they knew it. Was it sick that he kind of like it?

“I am sure you know the drill,” Tess said wryly. “So assume the position, and I realize as I said it, that it sounds so wrong.”

Tony smirked as much as the pain in his head would allow. So he put his heels together tilted his head back and touched his nose, which oddly had moved somewhere in the vicinity of his left eye. Awwwww shit.

“Hm. I think we will skip the alphabet portion of the test.” Pepper said dryly. “I am keeping your keys for now.”

“But.” Tony started to protest. Tess didn’t let him get far.

“Awww Pep,” she said not unkindly, “your boss is so cute. He thinks he gets a choice. That’s adorable. Is the coffee ready?” And with that she drifted off to the kitchen.  
Pepper didn’t say anything for a minute. She just stood there looking at Tony. He looks like hell on toast, she thought. She had never seen him this wrecked before. He stood there, swaying slightly, and looking like he would drop at any moment. Tony felt her gaze and shifted uncomfortably underneath it. He couldn’t look her in the eye for some reason and that worried him. Finally Pepper broke the silence,

“Um, do you want to lay back down or something?”

“No,” Tony said through still gritted teeth. Everything was swimming slightly, and he was doing his best not to lose it right then and there. He could feel cold sweat running down his back. If he went down now he would never get back up.

“Ok, then come have a cup of coffee.” Pepper turned and headed toward the kitchen. After a moment Tony followed.

In the kitchen he found Pepper standing at the sink again, with Tess perched on a stool at the small island that separated the kitchen and dining room. He staggered over and took a seat next to Tess. Pepper put a mug of coffee, exactly how he took it of course, down in front of him. No one said anything. 

The silence stretched on. Tony stared at the coffee mug in his hands, Pepper stared at Tony, and Tess shifted her gaze between the two, watching them. It was fascinating, in a really kind of fucked up way. He was waiting for Pepper to look away or say something, and she was waiting for him to speak first and the silence was making them both a little tense. It was a battle of wills, two very stubborn and strong willed people not wanting to be the first one to say something. 

Tess noted how unflappable Pepper appeared to be, and she knew her friend was formulating a plan of some sort. Pepper turned away slightly to face Tess. Tess met her friends gazed and smiled at her as she took a sip of coffee. She could feel the tension radiating off of Tony. He was wound tight with his wicked hang over, he probably didn’t remember much and that was driving him crazy. He knew Pepper had turned away and he stole a quick glance up at her. Ah, he was going to crack first. It would take time, but she could see it. While his defenses were run down, they were not completely gone. Tess wondered how long it would be until he built them back up.

But fuck it, thought Tess. She was hungry and, while this was indeed an interesting study of a relationship, of a rather twisted and co-dependent type, she was not going to wait around all day. Especially since it was her vacation. Tess broke the silence.

“So Pep, anything good for breakfast?”  
Pepper quirked a smile at her and glanced at Tony from the corner of her eyes. Tony had visibly relaxed, even though he was still hunched over in the throws of hangover hell.  
“Sorry Tess, I didn’t get a chance to go to the store before you got here. Things at work,” she didn’t finish the sentence but just gave a shrug. “Do you want to go out? It’s not even 10:30 yet, and there is a great diner about 20 minutes from here.”

“Do they have pancakes?” Tess asked. “You know how I feel about pancakes. Remember how they only had those horrible Belgian waffle makers in the cafeteria?”

“God, I had almost forgotten that!” Pepper said with a laugh. “And only one of them worked well?”

They both laughed. “And Smitty would get so pissed because he could never remember which one it was and half the time his waffle would be charred on the outside and runny in the middle.” Tess said. Another laugh. “Let’s do it. But what about your boss man.” She eyed Tony who’s eyes were shut and his hands were clamped around his coffee mug. “He’s not looking so hot. You still with us Stark?”

“Yeah. . . Pancakes. . .I’ll buy.” Tony said in a slightly strained voice.

“Maybe we should just take him home.” Pepper said quietly to Tess. “We could leave his car here and drop him off. Or I’ll drive him and you follow.”

“Or,” Tess said with an evil grin, “We could all pile into his car go get some glorious pancakes and take him back to his place.”

“No Tess,” Pepper started to say, but Tony cut in.

“No that’s good. Happy can bring you guys back.” Tony would have agreed to pretty much anything at this point Pepper realized. He was desperate to get out and use one of the sure fire Tony Stark fix-its – throw money at it and hope it goes away. Maybe this would be a good time to try and get her yearly bonus early? He would never remember at the end of the year. Sigh, sometimes it’s hard having morals. Especially when she had to have them for both of them.

“Great!” Tess said jumping off the stool, “I’ll be ready in just a second, let me put my contacts in.” She turned to head up stairs but stopped. “Um, Pep, do you have another shirt for him? The one from yesterday is pretty nasty.”

Pepper thought about it for a moment. She didn’t have any of his shirts floating around, having made sure to get the dry cleaning taken care of before Tess’s visit. None of her t-shirts would fit him, that and she really didn’t relish the idea of giving him one of her shirts. It was a bit creepy. There was something, but it wasn’t something that she liked the idea of. But there was nothing else. Sigh.

“Yeah I think I have something that would fit him.” 

“Go team,” Tess said as she headed up the stairs.  
“You sure that this is what you want to do?” Pepper asked Tony.

“Yeah,” Tony mumbled. “I suppose I owe you guys.”

“Oh you do. Consider this a down payment.”

Tony stared blankly down at the counter. Willing the pain to stop. “You ever going to let me forget this?”

“Depends on how good the pancakes are,” Pepper said heading upstairs. 

Tony realized that he must have fallen asleep for a few minutes because the next thing he knew Pepper was handing him his shoes, socks, and a folded grey t-shirt. It took Tony a few tries to get himself properly shod, but he managed. Without really seeming to care that Tess and Pepper were both there, or maybe because they were, he stripped off his undershirt and pulled on the one that Pepper had lent him. It turned out to be a rather faded UC Berkley shirt, that was just slightly too big on him. He pondered this for a moment. Pepper never went to UC Berkley did she? He was pretty sure not. Huh.

“Isn’t that Danny’s shirt?” Tess said this in a quiet aside to Pepper, but Tony heard her.

“It was all I could find,” Pepper whispered back. “Ready?” Pepper asked Tony in a normal voice.

Tony heaved himself up and had to hang onto the island as the world spun for a few moments. “Yeah.”

“Hey Pep,” Tess said conversationally as they all headed towards the door. “How about you let me drive?”

“Um, I don’t think so Tess.”

“Ah well. That will give me time to tell Tony here about that time with the reindeer.”

Pepper stopped dead in her track and whirled to face her friend. She narrowed her eyes, “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Reindeer?” Tony asked suddenly a bit more alert. “What reindeer?”

Tess smiled sweetly as she tied her hair back into a ponytail. “Oh I think for the chance to drive that car, I would.”

“Pepper, what reindeer?” A real reindeer?” Tony pestered. He became aware of a silent standoff. Tess continued to smile, holding out her hand for the keys. Pepper’s look could have boiled metal. But she eventually handed Tess the keys to the Audi. 

“I will make you pay for this.” Pepper said cheerfully. 

“I would expect nothing less. Remember, we only hurt the ones we love.”

“Then get ready for a blood and tear filled serving of love. But you won’t see it coming, I promise you that.”

“I heart you too Pep.” Tess said with a laugh as she headed out the door. 

It was another beautiful day in California. The sky was a bright blue and the sun was shining. The light bored into Tony’s skull as soon as he walked outside. It was so bright he had to shut his eyes to keep them from bleeding. 

“Fuck,” he growled.

“But isn’t that why people live in California? The glorious weather.” Tess said from behind her sunglasses. Tess was wearing a t-shirt and like most people from the East Coast in the late spring, her arms were a deathly pale.

“It’s the glare from your arms that’s so painful,” he snarled at her.

Tess laughed and gave him a playful shove, which sent him staggering a few steps. “I’m a red head, we usually only come out at night.”

They reached the car parked at its schizophrenic angle. It was a beautiful car, but a two seater which did pose a bit of a problem. All three of them looked at the car a moment. 

“I guess you will have to sit on my lap Pepper,” Tony said with a grin. “Just call me Santa.”

“Oh I don’t think so Tony.” Pepper said mildly.

“Oh, do I get to sit on your lap then?”

“No. You are riding in back,” Pepper said pointing to the very small space behind the seats. It was the small deck area where the top retracted into when it was down. And it was down currently. 

“What! But it’s my car! I’m your boss!”

“Yeah, and this is my day off.”  
He tried to stare her down, but the effect was negated by the fact that he could barely open his eyes because of the sun. Pepper was also wearing sunglasses and she stared calmly at Tony through them.

“Fine.”

“There’s a good sport,” Tess said encouragingly. “Pepper will even pull the seat up a bit for you, right Pep?”

“But only cause you asked so nicely” Pepper said with a smile.

Tony, grumbling the entire time, heaved himself into the car and with some swearing folded himself down into the space. He was practically hugging his knees, but he fit, sort of. Pepper got in, opened the glove compartment, pulled out a pair of sun glasses and handed them back to Tony who jammed them onto his face in irritation. But at least he could see, sort of. It felt like the light was boring through his eyes into his brain. Why did he agree to this? He was exhausted, he felt like shit and he just wanted to die for a few hours.

Tess got behind the wheel, adjusted the seat and mirrors and started the car. As soon as the car turned on, the stereo kicked to life at a decibel level that could liquefy eardrums.

“Shit!” Was the exclamation from all assembled. Gladys Knight and The Pips just had enough time to exclaim, “. . .that midnight train to Georgia.” Before Tess was able to wrench the volume down and turn off the radio. She turned around in her seat to look at Tony over the tops of her sunglasses.

“Dig the smooth sounds of the 70’s when we drink do we Mr. Stark?” 

“Just drive.”

“Certainly. Hey Pepper. Did you know he was leaving?”

“Oh he’s leaving. And on that midnight train to Georgia.”

Then they both said simultaneously, “WhooHoo!” While pulling imaginary train whistles. Tony just stared. What had he gotten himself into?

Tess revved the engine and backed down the driveway onto the street.

“Tess,” Pepper said in a warning tone, “be careful.”

“Oh I will. You got something to hold onto back there?” And with out waiting for an answer she dropped the car into gear, squealing the tires and shot up the street. She ran the car through its gears smoothly and they were doing almost 60 by the time they had to stop for a light. 

“Shit!” Tony said. His hands were clamped in a death grip, one on each seat.

Pepper shot Tess a look.

“Ok, ok. I’ll be good.” The light turned green, “Tony, your car just gave me girl-wood.”

“What?”

Tess just grinned at him and drove. 

The drove for a few minutes, Pepper giving directions. Tess and Pepper chatted and Tony sat hunched and grumpy in the back. He was hung over, he was bored. The girls weren’t paying attention to him. Tess was a good driver he noted, she handled the car well, but it was obvious that driving sports cars was not a normal occurrence for her. He watched how she rested her hand lightly on the gear shift while she made small circles on the top of the shifter with her thumb. Tony gave a slight shudder at the sudden memory of Tess running her finger along the edge of the arc reactor. Think of something else he screamed at himself. Another thought popped into his head. He reached forward and lightly tugged twice on her ponytail. She half turned her head to him, while keeping her eyes on the road.

“Can I help you with something?”

Tony bent forward until his chest was resting on his knees and put his left arm around the back of the drivers seat.

“Tell me about the reindeer.” He turned to look at Pepper and gave a charming smile. He stuck out his bottom lip in a small pout, “Please?”

“He’s a charmer this one,” Tess said smiling. “Well, you did ask so nicely. . “

“I swear to god Tess, if you tell him that story, I will have to tell him about the goldfish incident the night before commencement.”

“That’s low Pepper.”

“I know the feeling.”

Tony watched the exchange with gleeful smile. This was much more fun. Then the car came to a stop at a light and they both turned to look back at him, he shrank back a bit. Tess looked at Tony, then she looked at Pepper, then looked back to Tony.”

“Oh it’s soooooo worth it,” she said with a laugh.

“Don’t you do it!”

“Pepper, don’t make me crash the car, cause I will,” Tess said matter of factly as they continued on. 

“OK. So it was Christmas our Senior year,” Tess began.

“You will paaaaaaay for this. . .” Pepper muttered darkly.

“Shhh, Pep, don’t interrupt. Tony hasn’t heard this one. So it was around Christmas time, right before break, and we went downtown to see the light display. Who was there Pepper?” Tess asked merrily as she shifted gears and took a tight corner. “Right it was Smitty, me and the boyfriend at the time Bobby, Pepper and her latest squeeze. What was his name Pep? The kid with the stunning eyes, killer body and god-awful soul patch? He was a foreign exchange student. . .” Tess trailed off, waiting for Pepper to answer.

Tony turned to look at Pepper, “You dated a guy with a soul patch? I didn’t know facial hair did it for you.” He grinned.

“Well,” said Pepper said coolly, “it doesn’t. But I was young and dumb. And if you must know”, she said giving Tony a level stare, “he was one hell of a kisser. Facial hair has nothing to do with that,” she was pleased to note that his smile faltered for a moment. “Tomas, was his name his name Tess.”

“Right! Tomas the dreamy soccer player. Oh to watch the men’s team scrimmage shirts and skins. . .” Tess was silent a moment. “Ok I’m back. Where were we?”

“Tomas and his soul patch,” Tony said in a helpful, but slightly irritated way in Pepper’s direction.

“So there we all were,” Tess continued ignoring Tony’s comment, “Filled to the brim with holiday cheer, and, er, beverages to fortify us against the cold.”

“You were hammered,” Pepper said.

“Oh indeed I was! But Bobby was a strapping lad and was assisting me along my way. As we were heading back to the train station we passed a small display in a woodland theme. Filled with lighted trees, woodland creatures, and, anyone?”

“Reindeer?” Tony said helpfully from the back. 

“Right you are!” Tess said gleefully. “So there we are, pondering the glories of the natural world, and darling Pepper runs up throws a leg over one of the illuminated Bambi’s and proceeds to “ride” it for a few moments.”

Tony rocked backed laughing, it was sheer joy on his part, the mental image of a young, slightly drunk Pepper straddling a lighted plastic deer was too much. Even if she was dating a guy at the time who was convinced the soul patch was stylish.

“But that’s not the best part!” Tess said over his chuckling. “The best part was the Smitty had a camera, and was sober enough to take a picture.”

“There’s photographic evidence?” This made Tony giggle like a teenage girl, it was a little disturbing. “I will give you anything. . .”

“Oh well see, the original and the negative were later confiscated and destroyed by Ms. Potts.”

“Boo!” 

“Except of course for the copy that made it into the yearbook with the caption of, Pepper, you want to take this one.” Tess turned and smiled at her friend.

Pepper was sitting with her arms crossed and an expression that would curdle milk. She sighed and in a flat voice said, “The caption said, ‘No Pepper, that reindeer can’t take you to see Santa Clause.”

Tony laughed so hard that he had to clutch his sides. Pain split his head, but he couldn’t stop. He slumped to the side, resting his forehead against the side of Pepper’s seat. A wave of nausea hit him, he closed his eyes tightly, but that made it worse. He needed to stop moving.

“That’s it on the left there Tess.” 

Tony felt the car turn, and a few moments later they had stopped moving. He heard both doors open and close. 

“You coming Tony, or do you want to stay here?” Tess asked him.

The thought of staying in the searing pain of the sun was the only thing that made him unfold himself with the snapping of joints and climb out of the car over the side. His balance was shot and he started to fall but Pepper stepped up and caught him. He leaned on her for a moment.

“Let’s go inside,” she said as she started to steer him towards the door of the diner.  
The diner was a throwback to the 40’s, black and white checkered floors and red vinyl booth seats. Since it was a weekday, and later in the morning the place wasn’t too crowded. They were shown to a U shaped booth in the corner, and somehow Tony managed to seat himself between Pepper and Tess. 

It was slightly dim in the dinner, but Tony kept his sunglasses on. Elbows on the table, head in his hands, the world skid and spun around him. The ambient sound seemed to fade in and out and he was suddenly crushed by exhaustion.

“Can I get you folks something to drink?” the waitress said placing menus, silverware and napkins down in front of them. Pepper and Tess ordered coffee, but Tony sat still and silent, sinking into the misery of his hang over.

“He’ll have some coffee as well,” Pepper said.

“Rough evening I take it.”

Tess and Pepper looked at each other over Tony’s hunched form.

“You could say that.”

The coffee came along quickly, orders were taken, but Tony sat practically motionless through it all. He was sliding in and out of consciousness. He felt himself falling slowly to one side, unable to prevent it, only to be stopped by bumping into Pepper’s shoulder. She firmly shoved him away. He sat up trying to remain upright, but after a few moments he started tipping the other way. One again his progress was stopped, but this time by Tess’s shoulder. She too shoved him to the center. Tony leaned a little further onto the table and braced himself, head propped up by his left hand. Closing his eyes, he saw splotches behind his lids. He jerked awake as the plates were clattered onto the table. Tess had gotten her pancakes with a side of bacon, Pepper an omelet of some type, also with a side of bacon. While the food looked good, his insides clenched. 

Tess and Pepper continued with their conversation.

“So how are did your move to New York go?”

“Not too bad. One of the joys of moving from one city with a high cost of living to another is that it’s not too much of a shock. But I have yet to find an apartment.”

“Where have you been staying the past two weeks then,” Pepper asked.

Tess sighed. “In a hotel. I start the new job two days after I get back, and I don’t know how long it will take me to get settled. I had to put all of my stuff into storage. At least in Boston I knew the town and had friends, this has been a little tough.”  
“But you wanted the job, right? Profiling is what you’ve wanted to do for ages, especially for the government.” Pepper said slicing into her omelet.

“Mmm,” Tess said around a bite of pancakes. “Ohhh my god. These are the greatest pancakes ever. I would do dirty, bad things for these.” She had another bite. “Dirty, dirty things. I would have dirty, bad things done to me for theses pancakes.”

Pepper laughed. “Glad you like them. Unfortunately while my omelet is good, I don’t think is reaches the level of your pancakes. But the bacon, now that is almost grounds for lewd behavior.”

Tess swallowed her mouthful of pancakes. “Pepper, I love you. You brought me to this glorious place. I would have dirty things done to me with theses pancakes, for these pancakes.”

“Come on,” Pepper said laughing.

“Look, I’ve been eating Raman noodles and Easy Mac for almost ten days.”

“What? Why?”

“I’m in a hotel. I’ve got a microwave and a mini fridge and that’s about it.”

They were both silent for a moment as they ate. Then Pepper said,

“Look, I don’t mean to pry. But you never said what happened with you and Rob.”

Tony felt Tess tense beside him. She was silent for a moment, then took a sip of her coffee. Her voice was quiet as she said,

“No I didn’t. At right this very second, let’s just say that it didn’t work out the way I once thought it might have been possible to.” Tess was silent again. “We can talk about it later.” Her voice was strained as she said this.

“Ok,” Pepper said quietly. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought it up.”

“It’s ok. I’ve known you way too long for you not to ask. But we’ve got company so…Oh hey, I think he’s awake, I saw his arm twitch.”

Tony could feel them both staring at him. With great effort he reached out for his water glass and managed to take a sip. “I’m fine.” he muttered. With a great effort Tony pulled himself up straighter in his seat. It suddenly occurred to him that he was hungry, starving actually. He hadn’t wanted anything just a bit ago, but now his body was demanding that something be put in his stomach. He saw the bacon on Tess’s plate. It looked so tasty and crispy. He reached for a slice, and took the flat of Tess’s knife across his knuckles for his trouble. It had syrup on it and left a sticky glob on it on his hand.

“Oi! Hands off my breakfast.” Tess said with mild irritation.

Thwarted on his right, Tony turned his attention to Pepper’s plate, and the bacon that lay in crispy repose on it. Pepper could sense what was coming next and was ready for it. As Tony’s hand shot out for her plate, she deftly moved it out of his reach with her left hand and brought her coffee spoon down on his knuckles with her right. 

“Damn it I’m hungry!” Tony whined, as he sucked on his stinging knuckle. Mmm the syrup was tasty.

“Then you should have ordered something.”

“I wasn’t hungry then.”

“Not my problem.” Pepper said coolly, taking a bite of her bacon with a smile. 

“You don’t have to be mean.” Tony muttered under his breath.

Pepper sighed and handed him a triangle of buttered wheat toast from her plate.

“I want bacon.”

“Well I’m giving you toast.”

“Fine,” Tony said petulantly taking the slice from her. He examined the slice for a moment. “Don’t I get jelly?”

“No.” Pepper said nonchalantly returning to her breakfast.

“Not fair,” Tony mumbled darkly as he bit into the toast.

They finished eating and the check came. Remaining true to his half drunken promise from earlier Tony paid, but said sullenly as he did so, “Even though you wouldn’t give me any bacon.” They made their way back out to the parking lot. Tony felt slightly better, but even so he wanted to be home, and the idea of having to cram himself into the back of the car was giving him pause. It would be at least a 30 minute drive from here to Point Dume. Pepper had obviously been thinking the same thing, because she said,

“It’s mostly highway from here Tess, and I don’t think it’s a good idea to have Tony in back, so I think,” she sighed and shook her head, “that Tony should ride up front. With me.”  
Tony grinned widely, “This defiantly makes up for the bacon embargo.” He turned to face Pepper, “Do you want to be on top or on bottom?”

“Mr. Stark,” she said in a coolly professional tone, “ I merely make this suggestion for safety reasons, and to avoid the unpleasantness of trying to force you into the trunk.”

Tess suppressed a laugh as she opened the driver’s side door and got in the car. She watched in amusement as Tony wrenched the door open eagerly and dropped into the seat. He situated himself, then leering at Pepper, patted his knee and said,

“Tell Santa, have you been nice or naughty?”

Pepper crossed her arms and gave him an un-amused stare. “You should be more concerned about coal in your stocking than I. Maybe I should ride in the trunk, it’s not that far.”

Tony gave her an innocent look, “Fortunately for me I can make my own toys. Now get in the car Ms. Potts, I want to go home.”

Pepper sighed and with visible trepidation climbed into the car and carefully lowered her onto Tony’s right thigh. She angled herself slightly so right leg and lower back were back was against the car door, her left leg braced in the foot well between Tony’s knees. 

“Pepper, you should have let me have your bacon, think my legs are going numb.” Tony teased, obviously enjoying himself. They were able to get the seatbelt across both of them, even though Tony had to put the shoulder strap behind him. He turned to Tess. “Please don’t kill us.”

“I will endeavor to comply with your request,” Tess said sweetly as she started the car. But she was very smooth on her gear changes starting out this time. Once again Pepper navigated, but Tess kept it at the speed limit and seemed to be slightly more cautious as they made their way onto the highway. At highway speeds with the top down, the noise was pretty intense. No one seemed to be in the mood to try and scream a conversation. 

Tony settled back in the seat, letting the wind and Pepper’s streaming hair buffet his face. Pepper sat tensely for a little while, she must have been uncomfortable. Eventually she shifted herself around a bit, being hyper-aware of Tony’s body. She ended up leaning back slightly against his chest, her shoulder and his pressed together firmly. Tony leaned his head against the headrest and closed his eyes. He tried in vain to stay awake, enjoying the ride with Pepper on his lap. But the sound of the engine, the wind and the sun lulled him to sleep. 

He woke up as they were on the road to his house, the front gate coming into view. Tony realized and during the trip Pepper had readjusted her position again. She had crept a little further into his lap, not that he minded, and her left arm was now around the back of the seat. This afforded him, Tony noted, a nice view of her breasts, and even though her t-shirt was not very tight, he could admire their shape with ease. 

Tony still felt wrung out and raw, but the day seemed to be shaping up somewhat. Still he was glad to see the gates open and the front door rapidly come into view. Tess stopped the car and Pepper had to reach over him to get to the seatbelt release, but she couldn’t quite get it. 

“Got it,” Tony said somewhat in a daze. He hit the release and Pepper didn’t hang around. She got out and headed to the door.

“Was it something I said?” Tony said mildly.

Tess gave a laugh. “Maybe she didn’t like the fact that you snore.”

“I did not,” Tony said indignantly as they both got out of the car.

“At least you didn’t drool,” Tess said with a smile. “I must compliment you on your ride Pepper’s boss. Pepper had to yell at me several times to keep it under 80 on the highway. And you made it back in one piece, sort of.”

They walked in house, and Tess tried very hard not to gape. Well what did she expect from a billionaire? 

“Welcome home sir,” a voice said, coming from seemingly everywhere.

“Thanks Jarvis. Draw the shades will you?” Tony said removing his sunglasses reluctantly. The house complied and the room dimmed.

Pepper was talking quietly to a tall broad shouldered, solid looking guy in a black suit. Pepper introduced him as Happy Hogan, and Tess shook his hand, marveling at the size of them. She noted his slightly misshapen knuckles and they told a story of a guy who used to punch for a living. Pepper then started herding them to the door. 

“We had better get going,” Pepper said lightly. 

“You’re not going to hang around? I could give Tess a tour,” Tony said soundly slightly disappointed.

“Maybe another time,” Tess said catching the look Pepper was throwing her. “It’s been, uh, interesting. Nice to have met you, and thanks for the pancakes,” Tess said politely to Tony shaking his hand.

Then Pepper herded them out the door and heading to the waiting Bently. 

“Pepper,” Tony called before she had a chance to retreat completely.

Pepper stopped and slowly turned to face him. Tony walked over to her, he shoved his hands into his pockets and stared at her for a moment. She stared back, silent.

Tony cleared his throat. “Doing anything fun today?” he asked in an attempt to avoid the things that needed to be said, but probably really wouldn’t be.

“Well, you know,” Pepper said avoiding a direct answer, “girl time. Maybe the beach, maybe showing Tess around. We haven’t decided yet.”

“Ah.” More heavy silence. “Look, about yesterday.”

Pepper didn’t let him finish. “It happened, it’s done with. We move on. I have a few days off, we can leave it at that.”

“If that is what you want to do.” 

“Yes. So we will be leaving, Happy will be back as soon as he can, in case you need him. You might consider getting some rest.”

Tony stared at a spot near her right ear. Why was he having such a hard time looking her in the eyes? “I’m fine.”

“Ok. See you on Tuesday.” And with that Pepper turned and walked out the door.

Tony stood there silently for a moment. She hadn’t protested that he wasn’t fine. Hadn’t insisted that he get some sleep. She didn’t even want to chide him for busting into her evening like a rhino in a china shop. She hadn’t even asked for her shirt back. Maybe he had really crossed the line this time. She just seemed to want to not be near him. Worry began to solidify in his mind had he headed to his bedroom. He needed sleep, he needed to shower. But above all he had to somehow fix this. He walked into his bedroom stripped, fell face first onto his bed and promptly fell asleep.

Meanwhile, in the Bently, Tess and Pepper sat in silence for a few minutes. 

“You all right Pep?” Tess asked.

“Yeah. Just trying to figure out what to do about this.”  
“Did Tony say something about this whole fiasco?” 

“Not really.”

“Did you let him try?”  
“It’s my day off Tess. For once I would just like to pretend that I am normal and hang out with an old friend. I am even in such a generous mood, that I will not seek revenge on you today for telling Tony that damned reindeer story.” A though struck her, “Oh god, Christmas this year will be hell. I foresee reindeers of every description popping up in, on and around my desk for weeks.” Pepper sighed. 

“But won’t he have to have you order them?” Tess asked with a laugh.

“Possibly. Let’s just hope that he finds something more interesting to do in the meantime. You want to go to the beach today?”

“I didn’t bring my SPF 75 for nothing woman!” 

Tess and Pepper laughed as they headed back.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tess gets asked to dance, Pepper starts a fight, and Tony gets sharked.

Pepper applied the finishing touches to her make-up and thought about the events of the day. During the ride back she laughed as Tess and Happy debated the finer points of East Coast Baseball. The Red Sox -Yankees blood feud was dragged out into a hysterical conversation. It never failed to amaze Pepper how well Tess could get along with people.

“Look,” Tess had said hanging over the back of the drivers seat to talk to Happy, “I am not saying the Sox don’t have the bankroll to get good players, but they still don’t buy people like the Yankees do.”

“Then tell me,” Happy had counter and he maneuvered through traffic, “how is it that they have consistently won the series if not for the buying of talent. Manny Rameriez. . .” 

“Oh god, don’t get me started on that ‘Manny being Manny’ bullshit. He was better, thinner and less of an ass when he played for the Tribe.”

“Cleveland? Are you kidding me? They haven’t been seen in the division play-offs since the mid to late 90’s!”

Tess sighed, “I know, tis the curse of the Cleve. They do well until the moment they remember they are from Cleveland. They haven’t won the series since 1948 – and that was the year my Dad was born.”

“You a Tribe fan or something?” Happy queried, being a Dodgers man himself.

“Well sorta. My Dad is from Ohio, and my Gram was a huge Tribe fan. Listened to the games on the radio all the time. Had a cap and the whole nine yards. So she was rather, hm, disappointed when I moved to Boston. So Yeah, I will root for the Red Sox, especially against the Yankees, but when Boston plays Cleveland I have to root for the Tribe. Or she will come back from the grave to haunt me.”

After Happy had dropped them off, they had indeed gone to the beach, and Pepper found out that yes they do make SPF 75. They hadn’t stay out too long, Tess had wanted to avoid getting burned. So back to Pepper’s to get cleaned up and do the girly shopping thing. They had walked around for hours, Pepper picked up a few things and Tess had tried on a top that was to die for.

“It is fuck me on the floor fabulous isn’t it?” Tess had said somewhat wistfully. But she was going to put it back because she hadn’t started her new job yet, was living in a hotel, and had to put money away for a deposit on a apartment sometime soon.

Pepper had offered to buy it for her, and Tess had protested.  
“Don’t think I don’t appreciate the gesture Pep, I really do, it just,” Tess trailed off choking on her own sense of pride. 

“You can look at it two ways,” Pepper said, trying not to be exasperated at her friend’s stubborn streak. “It can either be about that fact that you are in a tight spot right now, which it is not. Or it can be about the fact that I want to do something nice for an old friend. A friend who flew across the country to see me because I can’t ever seem to break away from work. Then had to put up with my boss showing up completely wasted on my doorstep when we were supposed to be having fun. Also maybe as a congratulations on getting the job that you have worked hard for, have student loans up to the eyes and totally deserve. And besides, it is fuck me on the floor fabulous”

Tess flushed slightly, “Um, don’t hold anything back Pep, if there is something you want to say.” She sighed, “I know I am being stupid, it’s just,” she shrugged.

“That you are being an ass?” Pepper laughed. 

“Oh very possibly.”

“Just take the damn thing, you look great in it. And you can wear it out tonight.”

“Tempting fate aren’t we Pep? Do you think there will be a repeat performance of Sloshed Stark Theater?”

“God I hope not,” Pepper said heading up to the register. She had been feeling slightly edgy ever since she had left Tony’s. She knew he had no memory of his spectacular snot filled breakdown. And Pepper was not about to take that little stroll down memory lane with him. She knew he felt like he had to ‘fix’ something and that he didn’t know what it was. And when someone like Tony Stark felt they had to do something, but didn’t know what, the results could be very unpredictable. 

“Thanks, Pepper. And don’t feel too bad. It’s been interesting. Your men I swear.”

“Huh?” Tess last comment had snapped her out of her reverie. They walked out of the store into the glaring sun. “Tony is not...”

“Oh do explain Pep,” Tess said wryly, “He’s not what? Not the man you spend more time with than anyone else? Not the man who you have to emotionally guard against at all times? Oh and he’s defiantly not the man who you scared so badly that he tried to pickle himself, then drove to see you in the middle of the night and proceeded to get down on his fucking knees, cry on you and beg you not to leave him? Because if he is not, then I don’t think I actually met Tony Stark and that was an android or something that you set up for my entertainment.”

Pepper said nothing. She didn’t know what to say. She knew where she was on the inside of all of this, maybe, sometimes, but what must it look like from the outside? There was a reason that Tess was a profiler. And while she was very careful not to analyze her friends, what must this look like to her.

“Hey, how about I buy you a cup of coffee?” Tess said with slightly forced cheer. “Almost an even trade, yeah?”

They found a Starbucks, got their drinks and sat in silence for a bit. 

“I’m not trying to judge, or analyze ,” Tess started, “but I was there Pepper. I caused the whole chain of events, I saw…” she stopped and stared down at her coffee. “Not like I can really be the poster child for good relationships…”

And so they had talked about Tess and Rob. And the weeks of fighting that preceded the move, and the fact that he had started cheating on Tess. As they talked Tess picked at the paper insulating ring around her cup. Her voice tightened and relaxed, tears threatened but didn’t fall. 

“Tess, you are fucking fabulous and don’t you let anyone tell you that you are not,” Pepper said squeezing her friend’s hand. “You’re strong, you can do this.”

“Funny how it doesn’t feel that way sometimes, or hell most times. And I have to laugh, cause if I don’t I’ll cry. And he’s not worth my tears. He didn’t break my heart you know, I was never really his in the first place. But, I mean, fuck. I am so crap at dating.”

They laughed. But it hurt her, Pepper knew, it had only been a month. Then they talked about Danny. Pepper had never admitted before about how they had talked about living together. About how they had started talking about, not just the future, but their future.

“But then it was like someone threw a switch, you know? He wanted to get married right away, to have kids right away. It was like he had it all planned out in his head so that was the way his life was supposed to be. Never mind that I had a good career, never mind that the idea of being a house frau was never what I wanted. It’s been over a year and I still can’t shake the feeling that maybe that was my last chance.”

“Bullshit.”

“Yeah well it is bullshit. Then one day I realized that he loved his plan and not me. And that while he was sweet, he was. . .”

“Not the one?” Tess supplied.

“No, I was going to say flaming asshole, but then that’s me and my sentimentality.”  
They laughed, and both felt slightly better. 

“Boys are stupid,” Tess said with a smile. 

“Yes they are.”

“But I wouldn’t turn down the opportunity to search out some man-booty this evening. I need to work on my game.”

Pepper gave a snort, “What game? Chess? Go Fish?”

“I was thinking more along the lines of pool actually.”

“Hm, pocket pool maybe,” Pepper said with a smile.

Tess laughed, “You have a dirty mind. That is why I like you so much.”

So they had agreed to go out dancing, as neither had in way too long. They had returned to Pepper’s place, made dinner, talked and laughed and then around 9 pm they had started to get ready. It will be a good time, Pepper thought as she checked herself in the mirror. She was wearing a great pair of peep toe heels, the jeans that made her ass perky, and her second favorite top. As her favorite top was currently soaking in an attempt get Tony’s snot out of it. 

“Are you sure I can pull this off,” Tess said a little nervously from the hall. 

“What do you mean? You look great.”

“I am having a moment. It’s just look, this makes me have boobs, I’m not really used to that.”

“What having boobs?”

“No, taking them out for a walk,” Tess said as she rolled her shoulders. The top was a blue that worked well with her fair skin tone. The plunging neckline had required a bra change into the emergency red lacy underwire, but Tess had come prepared. Since it was sleeveless, Tess had started to worry about her paleness, but as Pepper pointed out, it will be dark, and no guy will be looking at her arms.

“You sure know how to make a gal feel special. The pants and shoes ok? They are the same from yesterday.”

“No your fine, I would not let you out if I though you were going to embarrass me.” Pepper said matter of factly, “stop stressing out. You’re not even from here, you fly back to the other coast on Monday!”  
“Ha! Very true, I could make a complete ass out of myself and no one would ever see me again.”

“Except me, and I would be sure to take pictures.”

“I feel the love. Right, well I need to nip into the bathroom for a minute then I will be ready to go.”

“Ok,” Pepper said as she headed down the stairs, “there’s no rush.”

Pepper had just reached the bottom of the steps when the doorbell rang. This had her hesitating. She wasn’t expecting anyone, she hadn’t called a cab. Tension sprang up her spine as she went to the door and looked out through the peephole. Her spine wound itself even tighter when she saw Tony standing on the other side of the door. Oh shit. Her heart hammering, Pepper opened the door.

Tony stood there for a minute blinking in surprise, almost as if he had expected her to not be home. Dressed in the straight-legged jeans that hugged his body nicely, and usually made Pepper have to steal one or two glances at his ass, along with the black button up shirt with the embroidered black pinstripes that were actually tiny hot rod flames. It was obvious that he was dressed to go out. Not a as flashy as he would if he were seeking a usual evening of wine, women, and song – the Stark version of course being scotch, super models, and group sex – but he wasn’t planning on an evening of reading to the blind either.

“Hi,” Tony says with a slightly sheepish grin. 

“Um,” Pepper is not really sure what to say. But her pause brings out the slight edges of panic in his expression. “Hi.” 

They stared at each other. Tony shoved his hands into his pockets and rocked up on the balls of his feet, took them out again. He was scrabbling desperately to come up with something cool to say, but he was tongue- tied. It was like seeing her in her “birthday dress” but with all the extra guilt of alcohol, vomiting and blackouts. He wanted to say he’s sorry, that he’s a fuck-up, and my god you are beautiful. But the best he can come up with is,

“Nice shoes.” What? What the fuck is that from the guy who went 12 for 12 with the Maxim cover models. What is he 13? “So I was in the neighborhood,” he began.

“Hey Pep you ready to. . . Aaahh. Pepper’s boss.” Tess had come down the stairs and into the hall. She stopped short in surprise. 

In a neat end run Tony stepped around Pepper into the house. Tony almost seems relieved to see Tess, an escape rout. “Pepper’s friend.” But he stops short, looking Tess up and down. This couldn’t be the same woman who teased him and made him sit in the back of his own car as she drove like hell. Tess felt his eyes on her and suddenly felt slightly embarrassed, like when the cute guy in school sits down next to you at lunch and starts talking to you. 

Tess recovered in a second, but it took Tony a bit longer. He looked at Pepper, he looked at Tess, they looked at him. They can almost hear the circuits in his brain frying. Tess sees him hauling at the fraying edges of his control. He’s better than he was that morning, but there is a huge Pepper shaped hole in his defenses. It’s fascinating to watch, and Tess has a flash of guilt at this. Pepper was one of her oldest and closest friends, and Tony was, well the chaos theory acting upon her life. Profiling was a bit um, gauche.

Meanwhile Pepper was going through a slow burn. This is what she had been worried about, Tony just blundering in and trying to charm his way out of the hole he had dug for himself. But, a tiny part of her brain argued, at least he was trying. 

Tony swallowed hard and mustering the dregs of his charm reserved, plastered on a smile and said, “So I was in the neighborhood,” he ignored Pepper’s derisive snort, “and I though that maybe you ladies would be available.” He stopped, not getting any encouragement from either. He coughed.

“I don’t know Tony,” Pepper said warily. “Tess and I were just heading out.”  
“Well I could go with you,” realizing how that sounded Tony started talking faster, “I mean, it would be on me, wherever you wanted to go. And I’ve got Happy with me to drive. What do you say Tess?” Tony had a pleading, almost puppy dog look.

Pepper was frowning, worried, “It’s up to you Tess.”

Tess sighed inwardly. Of course. Neither could say what they wanted to and act on it, so they put it on her. If Tess said no, then god knows what Tony would do, but he would be struck to the core. And if she said yes then Pepper would fret over the inclusion of Tony in their evening, and Tess understood that. He was trying to ‘fix’ this, and while he was good with machines, he had never really cared to learn how to be good with people, until post Afghanistan that is. She looked at them, watched them as they tried to not look at each other. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. But with Tony along at least it would be interesting. And he could buy the drinks. Right now she really need one, or maybe five. 

Tess smiled brightly at both. “It’ll be fun, why not?” Oh, there were so many reasons why not, said the look Pepper shot her. But Tony lit up like a kid at Christmas. He flashed his GQ smile again. Tess was impressed, he was rebuilding his walls quickly, but they weren’t rebuilt yet.

“Well, then lets go,” Tony said gesturing to the door. 

Tess checked her pockets for her ID and cash, usually all she carried when going out. Pepper put her keys in her small clutch bag and set the alarm as the three of them walked out the door. Tony opened the door to the Town Car, Pepper climbed in, followed by Tess. Tony jumped in after them. He was radiating nervous energy, obviously pleased that his plan seemed to be working so far, but still hesitant about what to do next.

“Hey Happy, how’s it going?” Tess called.

“Not too bad and yourself?” 

“Surviving,” grumbled Pepper.

“So where to?” asked Tony as he settled back in his seat and pulled a pair of tinted shades from somewhere. He slid them on. 

Ah, thought Tess, more armor. Interesting. “Well,” Tess said taking the lead, as Pepper was still trying to master her temper. “We had thought, maybe dancing, possibly a place to play pool.” She arched a brow at Pepper who smiled back faintly. “Any ideas? I’m not from round here.”

Tony thought for a moment, running through the vast index of favored nightspots in his head. “Yeah, hey Happy, um that place on. . .” 

But before he could finish Happy said, “Right.” Started the car, and off they went. 

There were a few minutes of awkward silence. Tony kept glancing at Pepper, who was staring out the window trying to ignore the looks he was giving her. Then Tess had a thought.

“Pep, as a mia culpa for this morning’s saga of college age Pepper,” Tony grinned widely at that, “I owe you. So tell Tony the goldfish story. Don’t judge me Tony, I was young, full of hope.”

“And a combination of Jager and scotch if I remember correctly.” Pepper said with a grin.

“Reeeeeeeeaaally?” Tony drawled, but he was all ears.

“So it was the usually gang of suspects. Smitty, Bobby, Tess, another friend Alley and her boyfriend Greg,” Pepper began.

“Was Tomas and his soul patch present?” Tony asked with a slight sneer in his tone.

“Tomas had gone home,” Tess interjected, trying to steer the conversation back on course.  
“I was dating Luke at the time,” Pepper said matter of factly. “You remember Luke, right Tess? 6’ 4”, all muscles,” her tone became slightly dreamy. Tony pulled a frown.

“And as dumb as a sack of hammers if I remember,” Tess said throwing Pepper a look. Why was she instigating? 

“Sadly that is true,” Pepper agreed, “but nice to look at.”

Tony looked like he was going to say something, but Tess cut him off.

“Anyway. There we were the night before commencement.”

“Who’s telling this,” Pepper said sarcastically.

“Then tell it,” Tess through slightly gritted teeth and shot her a look.

“Ok, ok. So it was the night before commencement, and all through the campus,”

“Seniors were giddy, eager for a rumpus,” Tess put in with a laugh.

The laugh broke the building cloud of tension and Pepper continued with a bit more gusto. “I’m not sure who’s idea it was originally, but it was decided that we should go out to the quad and sneak into the tents that were set up for the next day’s ceremony. And to add to the festive air, Smitty and Bobby decided to bring out the bottles that they had been saving. So we go down and start toasting. Well, Tess and Smitty start going shot for shot.”

Tess shook her head at the memory. “Not my brightest idea or proudest moment I assure you.”

Tony sat forward eagerly. Stories of others drunken escapade always amused him. They took the spotlight off of his own. Which was especially important considering the last 36 hours. 

“Well apparently the combination of Glen Fidditch and Jagermeister makes Tess a bit,” Pepper groped for the right adjective, “giddy.”

“As a Bavarian school girl,” Tess admitted. “At first anyway. The paranoia comes much later.”

“So Tess gets the brilliant idea to ‘emancipate’ the goldfish in the fish pond near the quad.” Pepper smiled at the memory. “But to be extra sneaky she ends up taking off her pants.”

Tony burst out laughing, “Any pictures of this Pepper?” he asks eagerly.  
“I can neither confirm nor deny the existence of such items Mr. Stark,” Pepper said coolly. “So she’s pants-less, but with her running shoes still on.”

“Hey, I needed the extra traction, those little fuckers were speedy.” Tess said in a mock defensive tone. 

“Uh-huh. Anyway, Tess goes in and after almost taking a dive a few times she actually manages to bag one. She hands it to Bobby, ties her pants around her neck like a cape and declares herself ‘The Fish Avenger’!”

“I say nay nay to that Pep.” Tess interrupted with a laugh, “It was the ‘Aquatic Avenger’, thank you very much.”  
Tony was laughing so hard that he was almost bent over double. 

“But then,” Pepper continued.

“There’s more?” Tony said gasping for air. “This is the best story ever.”

“Only because it doesn’t involve you and there is partial female nudity.” Tess said primly.

“Anyway, while Tess had been fighting the good fight over piscine oppression, someone had called the campus cops. So they roll up in the cruiser and we scatter. So there we are, legging it like there is no tomorrow. Bobby with the goldfish, which tragically did not survive the cross campus dash, and Tess running full tilt,” Pepper started to laugh here at the memory and took a moment before continuing between snickering, “Running full tilt with her pants flapping around her shoulders,” 

Pepper couldn’t maintain her composure any longer and started to laugh, which got Tony started again, and watching both of them, Tess joined in. After a few more moments Tess managed,

“If that taught me nothing it was composure under pressure. That and never to mix scotch and Jager again.”

“Can you still drink the stuff?” Tony asked as he wiped his eyes.

“Oh sure,” Tess said with a grin, “But it took me two years before I could look a goldfish in the eye without blushing.”

The rest of the car ride went much better, the tension having been eased. They all chatted amicably. Eventually the car rolled to a stop outside a trendy looking establishment with the epitome of California fashion, a long line and a velvet rope. This did not deter Tony one bit. He adjusted his shades as the car stopped, gave them both a killer smile and said, “Ladies first.”  
Pepper went first, and Tess automatically followed. As soon as she was out of the car the lightening storm of camera flashes shocked her, and like a deer in headlights she froze. She felt Tony’s hand on her back and heard him say, “Just smile and pretend you don’t care.” Tess balked for another second. Tony gave her a gentle push. “I got you Tess.” He put his arm around her waist and pulled her along with him as he smiled at the cameras without a care in the world to the shouts of “Tony! Tony! Over here!” and “Look this way Mr. Stark!”

Tony could feel the tension radiating from Tess’s spine, but she pulled her composure together and made toward Pepper, who was having a quick chat with the bouncer at the door. They bypassed the line and head directly in. The club was exactly as Tess though it would be, lots of beautiful people trying to prove how cool they were. The music was bass heavy and too loud. The dance floor had the lights and the seething mass of bodies one usually finds anywhere that alcohol and single people cross paths. And, as promised, there was a glass walled lounge area with a few pool tables. Of course, leave it to Tony to know the perfect place to bring them.

Tony felt Tess’s back relax. He grinned at her and dropped his arm.

“Drinks?” he yelled near Tess’s ear over the din. Tess nodded. “What do you want?”

Tess gave a shrug. “Surprise me she said loudly in his ear. 

Tony swaggered off to the bar. Tess noted his cool air of detached amusement. Pepper took her elbow and motioned to an empty table. They perched close to each other on the stools so they wouldn’t have to scream, as much, over the throbbing beat. 

“He’s in his element,” Tess noted, nodding at Tony who nonchalantly at the bar waiting for his order. 

“Almost his natural habitat,” Pepper noted dryly. She motioned to the pool tables. “You’re going to have to put up or shut up now. We have to get a game in before this night is over. I haven’t played in forever though.”

“I haven’t played in awhile either,” Tess said with a smile, “But I’m sure it’s like falling off a bicycle.”

Tony returned with their drinks. A martini in one hand and a scotch on the rocks and a Bombay Sapphire and tonic with lime balanced in the palm of his other hand. He set the drinks on the table. The martini in front of Pepper, the gin and tonic in front of Tess and took a sip of his scotch.

Tess turned to Pepper, “Did you tell him I love gin and tonics?” she asked as she took a sip. Pepper shook her head and Tony grinned.

“Call it an educated guess.”

“He’s a smart one.”

After a few minutes of contemplative sipping, Pepper suddenly seemed to make up her mind. She hopped off her stool, grabbed Tess by the arm and said, “Dancing now, please.”

“Ok,” Tess said with a laugh and took another swallow of her drink. “See you later Tony.”

“Uh,” was all Tony could get out before they were swallowed by the mass of bodies on the dance floor. Tony changed seats so he could face the dance floor. He found them again and watched as they started to dance. It took less than 60 seconds for the first guy to approach them. Tony was surprised that it took that long. Two beautiful and obviously single women dancing together? And red heads to boot? He would have been zeroed in on them in half that time. He watched them move. He knew Pepper could dance, and wasn’t surprised that Tess could too. 

Tony watched as Tess and a guy with horribly spiked blonde hair paired off. Tess wasn’t shy about letting him get close, but she didn’t let him get too grabby. Tony could see that the guy was saying something and Tess was laughing. He turned his gaze to Pepper. Something burned in his chest as he watched her dance with a guy that had to be at least 6’5”. She had liked tall guys in college. The thought came out of nowhere and the burning slid from his chest into his stomach. Tony swallowed some more scotch to see if that would help, but it didn’t. 

“Here all by yourself?” the question came from a girl, no more than 24 or 25 Tony guessed. She was a typical club girl. Tiny dress, stilettos, tanned skinned and bleached blonde hair. They were a dime a dozen Tony knew. Before Afghanistan he used to go through by the gross. 

“A good looking guy like you, that’s not right,” she leaned on the table, giving Tony an unobstructed view of her cleavage. He took another sip of scotch. He bet her name was Tiffany, or possibly Brittany. Something that ended in a “y” or and “i”. That was almost a given. “My name is Cindi, with an ‘I’. What’s your name?”

She probably knows who I am, Tony though as he gave her a slight smile. Any other time he would start the game. A little flirting, some more drinking and then a little entertaining fucking. Either in the bathroom at the club or in the car. But after the past two days, he just wasn’t inclined to play the game tonight. He glanced past her to the dance floor. He had lost sight of Tess, but he was able to find Pepper easily by finding the giant she was still dancing with.

“Well, hello Cindi – with an ‘I’. My name is Tony – with a ‘y’.” The flirting was automatic, but it didn’t want to encourage her.   
“You here alone, Tony?” she slid closer, putting her breasts within easy reach of the hand that Tony had resting on the table. “We could always change that.” She tilted he head down slightly and trying to give him what she must have thought was a sultry stare. To Tony it just looked like she was trying to see something stuck in her eyelashes.

“Well no actually,” he suddenly spotted Tess by the bar. She had a drink in each hand and was headed back towards the table. “I have a friend visiting me from the East Coast. A special occasion for her. She just stepped to the bar.” He gestured to the approaching Tess.

Cindi gave a pout. “Well she wouldn’t mind one more for the party would she?” She smiled and brushed Tony’s hand with her breast.

“She would actually,” he smiled and added just a tinge of regret that he didn’t feel. “You know how these East Coast girls are.”

“Am I interrupting?” Tess asked from behind Cindi. She was smiling, but there was a pinched aspect to it that Tony didn’t like.

“Yes,” said Cinid snidely.

“No,” Tony said as he slid off his seat. He came around the table, making sure to keep it between him and Cindi. He took the glass of scotch from Tess and downed it in a gulp. “Dance with me.” Tony took Tess by the elbow gently and steered her toward the dance floor.

“Uh, ok.” Tess said slightly astonished. She looked at the gin and tonic in her hand. “What the hell?” Tess knocked back her drink and put the empty glass on a table as they passed.

They got to the floor and the press of bodies surrounded them. It suddenly occurred to Tony that he wasn’t sure how close he could or should get to Tess, it was crowded, and normally for Tony dancing in this type of club was an aspect of foreplay for the club girls before a side trip to the bathroom or car. But Tess just stepped in to him and left about 6 inches between them. She casually put her left forearm on his shoulder and let her hand hang behind his back, but didn’t touch him other than that one point. She smiled at him and gave him a mildly interested look, as if she were waiting for him to say something.

Tony leaned in a bit towards her right ear to be heard over the chest pulsing bass, “That wasn’t what it looked like,” he said trying to explain.

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me Tony Stark. But it did look like she was using you hand as a coaster for her tits.” Tess said into his ear.

“She just. . .” Tony began.  
“They come out of the wood work you, I know.” She gave him a genuine smile. “I was just giving you shit. This isn’t going exactly how you though it would is it?”

Tony had caught sight of Pepper and the giant. A hot liquid swirled in his chest when he saw that the guy had his hand on Pepper’s hip. Tess followed his gaze. Ah. She watched as he wrestled his gaze away. 

Tess reached up with her right hand and slid off Tony’s shades. “I can’t take you seriously when you are wearing douche bag glasses.” Tess folded the glasses and tucked them into the front pocket of Tony’s jeans. “There you are. Hello.”

Tony blinked at her in surprise then gave a laugh. He found that he really like Tess, and he could see why she and Pepper had clicked right away. He liked watching her dance, in synch with the beat and just not caring. Tony leaned towards her ear again.

“Who’s Danny?” he felt Tess freeze for a heart beat. She looked at him, narrowed her eyes a fraction, but said nothing. “This morning,” Tony said pressing on, “you asked Pepper if the shirt she lent me belong to Danny.” He pulled back a fraction to watch her face, and found her studying him in a way he was not all too sure that he liked.

Tess was rapidly trying to figure out what he wanted. An answer definitely, but she knew that he had already been thinking about it, so no matter what she said or didn’t say it would confirm his theories. But the real question was why? The simple answer was to know more about Pepper. The more complex one was that he wanted to know her story, who she was when she wasn’t with him. Having seen her and Pepper together must have made him realize that still waters ran very deep with Ms. Virginia Potts. But this was Pepper and there was only one answer that Tess could give him.

She leaned close to his ear, “I can’t tell you what you want to know Tony. You will have to ask Pepper. I won’t decide for her what to share.” She pulled back and looked into his eyes. There was something going on in there, something very deep that he didn’t want to admit. That he was afraid to admit. She should be pissed that he had tried to pump her for knowledge, but the fact that he was so bloody inelegant about it made her think that there was no true malice behind it. Tony just didn’t know another way. He didn’t like the fact that he had had absolutely no clue about a man who had played an obviously very serious part in Pepper’s life for quite some time. But his next question almost stopped her cold.

“Who’s Rob?” It hadn’t been long enough yet for Tess to be able to hear his name without ice sliding down her spine and into her stomach. Again the question was asked so simply, as if it didn’t occur to Tony that people had things in their lives that they would not want him privy to. Hell, thought Tess, it probably didn’t. For almost all of his life he had never cared for what went one beyond his own personal wants and needs. And now that he did, truly wanted to be a better person, he was just crap at the intricacies of common privacy and social graces. The tiny meshing of the gears of interpersonal and intimate relationships were still new to him.  
Tony felt Tess’s body jump a beat out of synch when he had said the name. But he wanted to know. Because if he knew, then he could try and fix it. If he could fix it, then maybe Tess would like him. And if Tess liked him, truly liked him, then maybe Pepper. . . Tony found her again in the crush on the dance floor. Still with the giant, he had both hands on her now, but she wasn’t touching him. But he was touching her. . . Tony turned away and found himself staring into Tess’s eyes. She looked, sad? Angry? A little of both? Tony couldn’t tell, and he didn’t like that.

Tess felt the hot sting in her chest. It was still so soon after her talk with Pepper, like pulling a band aide off a deep cut too soon. She thought about it for a heartbeat. She decided that she didn’t want to be an open wound. She took a breath, her chest felt tight, leaned closer to Tony’s ear so she would be heard. A section of her hair slid forward over her eye, she didn’t mind, she really didn’t want to see Tony’s face. She chose her words carefully.

“He was the guy I dated in Boston for a few years. When I moved, he,” Tess could feel the hot tears and gin swell up into her throat. She swallowed them back, it only hurt a little bit. She started again. “When I moved he didn’t. And he.” She stopped. She wouldn’t finish that. The betrayal and the anger, there was no reason to show that to Tony. She liked him, how could you not? But up until the last 36 hours he had been just Pepper’s wacky, brilliant, womanizing boss. But he was real now. She said nothing, just focused on the music and moved with it.

Then Tony did something that surprised the hell out of Tess. He just simply reached up, brushed the section of hair out of her eyes and tucked it behind her ear. His touch made Tess’s skin tingle. He leaned closer to her ear and said matter of factly,

“He’s a fucking idiot to let you get away. You’re one of a kind Tess. You’re gorgeous.”

If he had sucker punched her Tess couldn’t have been more surprised. She blushed. She felt it start in her chest and the heat seared up to the top of her scalp. She didn’t know what to say. It was silly in a way she thought. But sometimes a woman just wants to hear that. And to hear it from someone as achingly handsome as Tony Stark. . . 

But the hot needles stabbed in further and for a stupid moment all she really wanted to do was hug him. Well if one was being honest, there was a decent sized chunk of her that wanted to fuck him six ways from Sunday and find out who would break first. But the mushy girly part that hadn’t had time to get it’s armor on just wanted a hug from a hot guy who thought she was pretty and wasn’t related to her. She didn’t trust herself to speak, so she just brought her left hand up to his neck, gave a quick squeeze and dropped it back.

But a club floor in LA is not a place that tolerates sweet moments. It became apparent that the clubs girls had seen Tony, and knowing his reputation were going to make a play for him. The first girl had come up behind Tony and was starting to grind on him. There is a complex ritual that exists on dance floors, a law in and unto itself. And if you step into its boundaries, you are at its mercy. But Tony had been around, oh had he ever, and knew how to work within zeitgeist of it. He simply ignored the girl, put a hand on Tess’s hip and moved in closer to her. After a few beats the girl realized that he wasn’t going to take the bait and moved off. 

A few other girls tried their luck only to get the same reception. And with each one Tony and Tess moved in closer to establish that she was the one he was dancing with, and that was it. Eventually Tess found herself with both of Tony’s hands on her hips. She had put her arm across Tony’s shoulders, her other hand resting on his chest to establish possession and they were so close that their belt buckles almost touched.

Tony liked the way Tess seemed to flow under his hands to the music, a constant with the beat. He could smell her perfume and the memory of her holding him up, bodies pressed together as she fought to keep him up right came back to him. She did smell so good. He had liked the way she had blushed when he had said something so simple and true. He found himself staring at her collarbone and wondering what it would feel like to skim his lips over it, tracing the faint dusting of freckles that were there. Wondering what else he could do that would make her blush.

Tess became very aware that while Tony’s right hand was still on her hip, it was now more over her kidney. His left hand had somehow, with out her realizing it, slid under her shirt and was now on the small of her back. Tony’s thumb making small circles on the flesh of her spine. Did he even know he was doing that? It was like a current charging up and down her back. Tess could feel the brush of his goatee against her cheek. It would be so easy just to lean forward, tighten her grip on his shoulders, and brush her lips against his jaw and throat. When he didn’t douse himself in scotch he smelled sexy. It would be so easy to. . . 

. . .just apply a little bit of pressure to her back, just where he could feel the strong cords of it moving with the beat. Pull her in till their hips met. She had beautiful hair and such a strong body. Different but also so familiar. His chest tingled as he remembered how she had run her finger around the seam of the reactor, the shiver that it had given him. Tony felt the slight perspiration of her back under his circling thumb. . . 

What would the arc reactor feel like pressed hard against her chest? Then Tess knew they were on a knife’s edge. If he pulled her close, she wouldn’t resist. She steeled herself, and that part of her located slightly below her belt buckle screamed at her not to do it, but she angled her head and said, gently but firmly into Tony’s ear.

“I’m not Pepper.”

“Hm?”

She tried again, a bit more forceful, she was sinking fast and she knew it. Her tone was still gentle, “Tony. I’m not Pepper.”  
He turned to look at her, almost as if he was in a daze, and stared uncomprehending for a second. Then she saw the realization break over him, and it was better than a bucket of ice water. He smiled, slightly nervous, “I know. You’re Tess. Pepper’s friend.”

Tess smiled at him and they both pretended not know what had almost happened. But Tony was stuck, he couldn’t very well shove her away, and he didn’t know how to step back. Part of him didn’t want to. Tess did the only thing she could think off. Loudly and with forced cheer she proceeded to tell Tony the dirtiest limerick she could think of. His laugh was part relief, part nerves, and part cause, damn, it was a good limerick. 

For the next few minutes they traded limericks and dirty jokes, and in that time of leaning into each other’s ears to be heard and laughing, they both stepped back from each other slightly. Still together, but separated by much firmer emotional ground and a few desperately important and needed inches. They left the dance floor a little bit later and headed towards the lounge with the pool tables. Tess with a new understanding of Pepper’s iron will, and Tony with a few new versions of “There once was a man from Nantucket” stored away for future use. 

Pepper was eventually able to extract herself from the huge paws of the giant to look for Tess and Tony. She saw them in the lounge setting up a table for a game. They seemed to be at ease with each other. As she approached them she could hear, it was slightly quieter in the lounge, the walls must be soundproofed slightly, Tess finishing a joke.

“. . .as soon as I figure out how to take it’s pajamas off I’m going to fuck it.”

Tony was leaning against the pool table and laughing. Pepper walked up behind Tess as she was racking the balls.

“The octopus joke?”

“Hey Pep. Of course the octopus joke, it’s a classic.”

Another round of drinks was sitting on a small ledge build into the wall next to the table. A martini sat waiting for her. Tess picked up a cue and started chalking it, she said casually,

“Tony wanted to play 9 Ball, but I told him that I didn’t think that was a good idea.”

“But she wouldn’t tell me why. I have to assume that it’s because she’s horrible at it,” Tony said half teasing as he took a sip of his scotch.

Pepper quirked a smile at her friend. “Oh no, it’s just that.” Pepper stopped and gave a shrug.  
“It’s just that I only played for money,” Tess said evenly, inspecting the cue she held in her hands. 

Tony knew he was being challenged. He knew he was good at pool, it was all angles and deflections after all. He put his glass down and pulled his shades from his pocket. Putting them on he grinned at Tess. 

“Money I’ve got.”

Tess looked at Pepper who had molded her face into the very picture of innocent curiosity. She looked back at Tony, who was smirking at her from behind those fucking stupid glasses. Sigh, she almost always hated making grown men cry.

“I only gamble with my life Mr. Stark, never my money,” she said demurely.

“Oh come on,” Tony said picking up a cue of his own, “I’ll let you set the bet.”

“I dunno,” Tess said reluctantly.

“When you lose I won’t take your cash,” Tony said magnanimously, “The barter system also works.” He arched a brow at her.

“When I lose? Hm, interesting.” Tess reached into her pocket and fished out some cash, after a quick count, she put some back in her pocked and folded the rest. “Fifty is all of the ready I can spare currently.”

Tony fished his wallet out, examined the contese, pulled out a bill, “Got change for a hundred?” 

“Pep will you hold the cash?” Tess asked sweetly, a slight steeliness under her tone. Pepper collected the money and stood back, this was going to be interesting.

“Shall we flip, shoot or go odds and evens to see who breaks?” Tess asked re-racking the balls for 9 Ball.

“Ladies first.” Tony insisted.

“You sure about that?” Tess asked, picking up her cue.

“Yeah,” Tony said picking up his scotch. He was being cocky and he knew it.

Tess knew this too, and she would make him pay. She gave him a smile that was all teeth and predatory intent. “If that’s what you want.”

Tess approached the table and Tony could almost feel the intensity building up in her. The cool control spun out from her shoulders and she set up her shot. Face blank and body steady, she began. The cue struck with a crack and the balls danced and spun. Two neatly disappeared into the pockets, and Tony realized that he had truly underestimated the ease in which he had intended to win. He shot a look at Pepper who smiled broadly and winked at him. Shit.

Tess stalked around the table making her shots with a calculating accuracy that shocked Tony. Purpose driven and relentless, Tess cleared the table flawlessly in a matter of a few minutes. After it was over the intensity switched off, sinking back into whatever recess she kept it. She picked up her drink and took a big swallow. She smiled coyly at Tony over the rim.

“What the fuck was that?!” Tony said in sudden exasperation.

“That was 9 Ball Mr. Stark.” Tess said evenly. “But I think the term you are looking for is ‘sharked’.” But the way Tess pronounced it was all Boston with no room for “r”s. It sounded more like “shahked”.

“Warmed up now Tess?” Pepper asked as she passed her the winnings. Tess snagged the hundred but held out the smaller bills to Tony.

“Your change.” She said sweetly.

She’s actually serious Tony realized. He laughed and shook his head, “Oh no you keep it, you warned me.”

Tess hesitated. She really did need the money. Why she had even bet fifty in the first place she couldn’t say. But her stubborn pride balked. Tony saw this. He took the bills from her, folded them and stuffed them into the front pocket of her jeans. 

“Consider it the cost of a lesson,” he muttered quietly.

Something in Pepper was touched by this. Tony could be and was generous with his fortune. But there were times that she wondered if he really understood what his pocket money could mean to someone. Tess wasn’t in trouble, she was just pinched. Pepper knew her friend would be fine once she got a bit more settled, but at this moment she would need it. Pepper willed Tess to just let it be, and to her relief Tess just nodded.

“Consider me schooled,” Tony said lightly. Moving past Tess to re-rack. “How about I play you at 8 Ball Pepper? I think I could take you."

“I am sure that you think you could,” Pepper said mildly, sipping her martini. 

“Or how about I play both of you?”

“You want us to double-team you Tony?” Tess said wickedly.  
Pepper walked over to Tony, got in close, and put her hand lightly on his hand that was resting on his pool cue. Tess watched the effect that Pepper had on him. His smile faltered for only a moment, and he shifted his weight towards her.

Pepper looked at him as she ran her thumb along the pool cue. “Do you think you can handle both of us Mr. Stark?” 

Tess could see his brain burning with the suggestion. Wow, if they could download the movie that just flashed through his brain and sell it, her student loans would be gone in a week. But before he could say or do anything, Pepper pulled the cue out of his unresisting grip and walked back over to Tess. She turned and standing shoulder to shoulder with Tess Pepper said,

“Well, are you up for it Tony?” her tone was cool, on the very edges of flirtatious.   
Pepper saw with a small thrill of satisfaction that Tony’s Adam’s Apple slammed up and down. She couldn’t hear his gulp from where she was, but she knew he had. Why the hell did she just do that?! The cool, logical and highly profession, PA part of her brain screamed. Because she thought that she could and wanted to see if she was right, was the answer. Plus he was always flirting with her, always knowing that what her reaction would be. But she was on vacation damn it and it was her turn. Plus he was so damn cute when flustered. But she slammed the door hard on that thought and turned to Tess. 

The look that Tess gave her made Pepper think that Tess had just read her mind. She started to blush, but Tess just gave a cheeky wink and turned to Tony.

“Don’t just stand there, rack ‘em up Tones,” she stalked to the table and leaned her hip against it. “Don’t worry I’m not playing for blood this time, but Pepper,” she trailed off and shrugged. “But we’ll let you break.”

The game that followed was some of the most fun that any of them had had in quite awhile. They teased each other, and Tony found himself on the receiving end of more than his fair share. Tess and Pepper as a united front was something to see. Tony liked watching them interact, he like seeing this side of Pepper. Inappropriately funny, sarcastic, and relaxed. And while they could have and would have had a good time without him being there, they didn’t freeze him out. While they could have spent the entire time talking about people and things that he had no knowledge or interest in, they included him. It was nice.

Tony had had a good break and ended up being stripes, so Tess and Pepper played solids. He could tell that this type of team play was nothing new to them. While Pepper played with an efficient skill that he didn’t know she possessed, it was obvious that she was a bit rusty. And while she was true to her word, and was not out for blood, it was obvious that Tess was the better player. There was a calm focus that she held when she would line up her shot. But she was not above cracking a joke while doing so.  
“Stop staring down my top Tony,” Tess had said a matter of factly while lining up a particularly tricky bank shot, “it’s creeping me out. Or are you trying to distract me?” She looked up at him then, locked her eyes on his and nailed the shot.

“Now you are just showing off!” Pepper had laughed, giving her friend a slight bump with her hip as she walked by.

“Eh,” Tess shrugged giving Tony a smile, “I have so few skills, you can’t blame a girl for showing off every once in awhile.”

They beat him handily in the first game, but in the second it was obvious that Tess was backing off a bit. But it was fascinating watching them. Tony couldn’t help himself, he pulled out his phone as unobtrusively as possible, turned on the camera and waited for a shot to present itself. And finally it did. It was Tess’s turn, and she was lining up her shot, face serene. Pepper stood just off to the side, looking at the same shot on the table, the butt of the cue on the floor and both of her hand wrapped around the top. She too looked serene, with a slight smile on her face. Tony snapped the picture. The sound of the camera was covered by the music, and he shoved the phone back into his pocket. He didn’t think they saw him. 

“Anyone for another drink?” Tony asked casually as he walked around the table viewing his options. 

“I had better not.” Pepper said matter of factly. 

“Peeeeepper,” Tess said in an exasperated tone, “You’ve only had two. C’mon.”

Tony grinned, “How about this, if I make the bank shot using the 15 to sink the 4,” Tony was solids this time, “Then you’ll both have one more, of my choosing.”

Tess looked at the table, it was one hell of a complex shot. In a fun game like this she would attempt it, but as a serious shot, which to Tess was any shot that involved a wager, she didn’t think she would. Unless she wanted to lose. 

“What do you think Tess?” Pepper asked.

“I can only tell you that in a wager situation it is not a shot that I would normally take.”  
Pepper considered this. “Ok, Tony it’s a bet.”

Tony grinned. He took his shades off and handed them to Tess.

“Oooh, I think he’s serious Pep.” Tess joked.

He took a breath and centered himself. He bent over and lined up his shot. Don’t rush, just line up the point that you need to strike the cue ball to get the proper rotation and momentum. He calculated angles and trajectories for a moment then took his shot. He struck the cue ball perfectly. 

Tess watched as the cue ball rocketed forward, ricocheting of one bumper, changed course, changed course again with the aide of another bumper and smacked into the 15 sending it along the rail and with a click hit the 4, which dropped neatly into a side pocket.

“I would be pissed if I wasn’t so impressed Tony.” Tess said good naturedly. Pepper stood still with a look of surprise lifting her eyebrows. 

Tony put the cue in the wall rack, got his shades back from Tess and gave them a wide smile. “I shall return shortly with your beverages ladies.” And he headed towards the bar.

“Well fuck me sideways,” Pepper muttered.

“Hm,” Tess said with a bland look, “I don’t think he would mind.” She jumped out of the way of Pepper’s fist. Laughing with her hands held up in placating gesture, “I’m just saying Pep!”

“Hm.” Pepper replied tartly.

“Hm” Tess said back.

“Hm”

“Indeed.” They both laughed.

Tony returned a bit later with two tumblers of dark liquor. He handed each one over with a flourish. Tess sniffed and gave a laugh. 

“Jager? Subtle, Pepper’s boss, really subtle.”

“Bottoms up ladies,” Tony said with just a hint of vocal leering.

“Shit.” Pepper mutter.

“A deal is a deal Ms. Potts,” Tony chided. Her irritated sigh made him smile more.

“Just shoot it back Pepper. Just like Freshman year, well but hopefully with out the same results as that one time. . .”

“Is it time for a another story?” Tony asked eagerly.  
Both women turned to look at him, “No.” they said in unison and threw back their drinks simultaneously. 

Some little time later Tess and Pepper made their way to the ladies room. They left Tony at the pool table.

“Don’t play with yourself too much while were gone,” Tess had shot at him over her shoulder.

They were on their way back from the Ladies room when a wall came out of nowhere, but this wall was wearing a shirt and seemed to know Pepper. Damn thought Tess, this dude was big. Not just tall but broad. She wondered if he played a professional sport of some type. He was a good looking guy, with light brown hair and nice grey eyes. But he was young, not much older that 24. And he was slightly drunk. There was a slight sway to his stance, and two of his friends were next to him, obviously ready to yell “Timber” if he started to go over. They both looked bored. And one was the guy with the spiky blonde hair that Tess had danced with earlier. He didn’t seem to recognize Tess, and Tess was ok with that. 

“Hey,” the giant slurred. “I’ve been looking for you.”

“Oh you know,” Pepper said noncommittally, “I am here with some friends.”

They were near the bar now, Tess between Pepper and the bar, and unfortunately the giant was between them and the lounge. Sadly the giant was too drunk to get the drift of what Pepper was hinting at, in other words, not interested. 

“So can I buy you a drink or something?” Oh god it was painful to watch. Pepper was a good person, a kind person, and she was patient. 

“That’s really sweet of you, but my friend and I really need to get going.”

“Awww come on,” he said trying to be persuasive, “just one drink?”

The blond guy but a hand on his friends arm, he gave Tess and Pepper an apologetic smile. This apparently was not a new occurrence. “C’mon Brian, we should let them get on their way.” 

“Duuuuuude!” Brian the giant said to his friend in irritation and shook off his hand. “How about one more dance then?” he continued as he put a hand on Pepper’s shoulder.

“Ah, there you are,” Tony said good naturedly as he appeared behind Tess and Pepper. “I thought you had gotten lost, I was getting worried. Who’s your new friend?”  
Tony took a small step that placed his shoulder between Pepper and Brain the drunken giant. And it was obvious to all present, except Brian, that Tony was not going to go away. Both the friends now put a hand on their buddy.

“C’mon Brian,” the other friend a guy with black hair and an eyebrow ring said a bit nervously, “let’s go, they are here with somebody.”

Brian still had a hand on Pepper and Tony didn’t like it. The image of them dancing with his huge paws on Pepper’s hips flashed in his mind. It was followed very quickly by a burning sensation in his chest. But he kept his smile in place.

“I wasn’t talking to you,” Brian said coldly. Both of his friends winced.

“Look,” Tony said more to the friends that to Brian, “how about I buy you guys a round huh? It’s late and we must be going.”

“Yeah, cool,” the Blonde friend started to say, pulling on his friends arm again.

Brian took his hand off of Pepper’s shoulder, and dropped both his arms at his sides. He turned a bit to face Tony and his hands balled into fists.

“Fuck you man.”

The friend with the eyebrow ring winced in horror, “Dude, let it go. That’s Tony Stark. Dude that’s Iron Man.” He too started to pull on his friends other arm. But Brian was having none of it.

He’s too young, drunk and horny to know better, thought Tony. Ahhh to be in my 20’s again, or even my early 30’s. But Christ this kid was huge.

“Iron Man huh?” Brian said with a sneer. “Well I was talking to her.” Brian made to take a hold of Pepper again when a lot of things happened at once. Brian shook off his friends, Pepper took a step back out of his reach, Tess grabbed a hold of Pepper’s elbow pulling her back further, and Tony stepped in between Pepper and the giant.

“And I was talking to you,” Tony said, all friendly-ness gone. He squared his body a bit. This kid had several inches a quite a few pounds on Tony, but white hot anger was pumping in his blood and he didn’t care. He had tried to touch her. . .

“Let’s see how fucking tough you are with out your fucking suit fucking asshole,” Brian growled. And before his friends could stop him he hauled off and punched Tony. His huge fist seemed to travel in slow motion for a split second before it connected with Tony’s chest almost squarely on the arc reactor. 

Tony felt more than heard the kids hand break, a wet pop. If he hadn’t squared himself he would have been knocked off his feet. But still the force was so great that it knocked him back and almost to his knees. Pain shot through him followed so closely by a blinding rage that his vision faded for a heart beat. 

Brian gave a short scream of pain and bent over clutching his hand. Rage poured through Tony, followed by all the fear and doubt of the last two days. He didn’t think he just reacted. Tony’s fist came around in blur, a haymaker that would have made Happy proud. And behind it was the fear of losing Pepper, the anger of seeing her dance with this stupid kid, of her being pawed at by him, the hurt of the punch and the doubt that he felt every day when he was around her, not knowing what to do or how to do it. Tony’s fist connected squarely with Brian’s nose and there was a satisfying crunch as he felt it break under his knuckles. 

Brian went down on one knee clutching his bleeding nose. He gave an inarticulate howl of rage and tried to lunge at Tony, but both of his friends jumped on him driving him to the floor. A bouncer came out of nowhere and waded into the fray. 

“Jesus! Tony!” Pepper cried, fear ringing through her voice.

Tess felt adrenaline coursing down her spine into her legs, the tiny lizard part of her brain screamed run, but she ignored it, barely. She had lost a hold of Peppers arm and tried to get it back to keep her friend out of the way, she took a step forward and stopped short as Tony turned her way. 

“We should be going now,” he said. He grabbed Pepper’s hand with his left hand and started dragging her out, his right arm caught Tess around the waist and started propelling her forward. Tess didn’t need to be told twice. They didn’t run, but they weren’t moving slowly either. Tony barreled through the crowd surging the other way pulling Pepper and Tess along in his wake. They were through the door and out on the street in what seemed no time at all.

Tess stepped away from Tony. She had broken out into a cold sweat and her body was shaking slightly with the initial flight response. She turned to see if Tony and Pepper were alright.

“Hot staggering fuck,” Tess said at Tony. But Tony was looking at Pepper, who was pale and shaking. Tess noticed that they were holding hands, fingers interlaced, and neither seemed to notice this.

“Oh my god. Tony are you alright.?”

“Yeah.”

“Good, cause that was one of the stupidest fucking things I have ever seen you do!” Pepper snapped, fear driving her into rage for some reason she couldn’t understand.

“What?!” Tony said stunned. “I was trying to help!” he snapped back hurt driving his anger.

“I didn’t need. . .” Pepper started to say pulling her hand away from his.

“Well that’s gratitude for you! Fucking hell Pepper did you see the size of that kid?!”

“Gratitude? For what? I never asked you to save me! What did you expect? A cry of ‘My Hero!’ as I fainted into your arms!”

“Well a little appreciation would be nice! Did you see the punch I took? I mean my god!”

Tess watched them snipe at each other, their fear and relief making them lash out and hurt each other because they didn’t know what else to do. This was going to spin out of control if it went on much longer. Tess felt slightly giddy with relief herself, but decided to do something a bit more constructive with it.

Tess took two steps up to Tony grabbed his face in one hand. “My hero.” She said in exasperation and kissed him. 

One Mississippi. Ok Tess could tell that he was shocked. Two Mississippi. Did he just put his hand on her hip? Three Missisip. . . oh shit, he was starting to kiss her back. Three Mississ. . . Damn he smells amazing. Four Miiiii. . . What number are we on? 

Tess realized that she had about one millisecond before he was going to put his tongue in her mouth and that she was going to let him. She heard her brain scream FIVE MISSISSIPPI!!!!! For the second or third time and she forced herself to pull away.

Tess stepped back and hopped that he didn’t see the slightly stupid look on her face. She was relieved to see a slightly stupid look his face too. “That was from Pepper.” She gave his cheek a pat. She walked calmly over to Pepper and said, “Remember, they were fighting over you.”

The gods must be smiling on me, Tess though as Happy and the Town Car slid up to the curb in front of them at that moment. She didn’t look back, just walked over, pulled open the passenger side door, and got in the front seat next to Happy. Turning to look Tess saw Tony and Pepper just staring at each other stupidly for a moment. Pepper snapped out of it first, grabbed Tony by the wrist and pull him toward the car. They were in the back a second later.

“Have a good evening?” Happy asked in a neutral tone.

“Fine,” said Tony slowly.

“Great,” Pepper said sarcastically.

“Tony took one hell of a punch to the chest,” Tess said mildly. “And I think he broke that giant’s nose.”

“What?! You ok boss?” Happy asked in alarm.

“I’m fine,” Tony said, than gave a sharp intake of breath from pain.

“He got punched on the reactor Happy.” Pepper said slightly agitated.

“Should I go to the hospital?” Happy asked.

“Yes, said Pepper.

“No,” said Tony at the same time. “No.” Tony said again in a firmer tone giving Pepper a look. 

“Then let me see.” Pepper said reaching for the front of Tony’s shirt.

“What?” Tony asked truly shocked. “No. Pepper get off!”

“I bet those were words he never thought he’s say,” muttered Tess quietly to no one. She heard Happy give a slight cough, but when she looked at him his face betrayed nothing.

Meanwhile in the back Tony was trying to fend off a determined Pepper. She had his shirt unbuttoned before he even realized it. How the hell did she do that he wondered. He put his hands up palms out to ward her off but she would not be thwarted that easily.

“Pepper, quit it I’m fine,” Tony said with a mix of irritation and apprehension. “See Happy, I do have to fight them off,” he tried for humor but it failed miserably.

“He got you square in the chest Tony. I heard the reactor break his hand. That can’t be good. Stop being a big baby.” Pepper managed to grab a corner of Tony’s undershirt.

“Are you doubting my engineering prowess?” Tony said with a slight nervous hitch in his voice as he tried to squirm away.

“No.” Pepper said in irritation, worry starting to creep in as well. Why wouldn’t he just let her see? She had to know if he was ok. The big jackass. “I just want to see for myself. Quit squirming.”

“Pepper! Quit it!” Tony said in a slightly desperate voice.  
He tried to feint left but Pepper firmly planted her knee on the seat, preventing Tony from being able to slide his hip out of the way. He tried to slide the other way, but he was at the end of the seat and was backed up against the door trapped. Tony tried to push her hands away, but she was somehow able to get under his guard. He stopped struggling suddenly when he felt her hands come in contact with flesh on both sides of his ribs.

Palms flat against his sides, Pepper hooked the material of his undershirt with her thumbs and pushed it up. Tony tried to suppress his shudder as he felt her hands skim firmly, but gently up his torso. Pepper leaned in for a closer look, and Tony noted how the light of the reactor illuminated her features. 

Pepper’s sharp intake of breath had Tess turning around in her seat.

“Damn.” Tess said.

“Oh Tony,” Pepper said quietly in a way that both thrilled him and made him worry.

“What? What is it? Is it bad?” he looked down. On the top right quarter of the reactor was a welt the size of his thumb. It was an angry red and already was beginning to bruise a dark purple. It was a knuckle print. When the punch connected, the slightly domed surface had deflected it slightly and the fist had slide sideways, knuckles connected with the pectoral muscle.

“Shit. I’m glad he didn’t punch me in the face. I’m pretty and would like to keep it that way.” Tony said with a levity that he didn’t feel.

Pepper ran her thumb gingerly over the welt and Tony winced.

“Hurts?” she asked quietly with concern.

“Yeah, cause you keep poking it. Ow! Quit it!” 

Pepper started to run her fingers very slowly around the reactor where the skin and metal met. That shivering sensation was almost too much for Tony.

“Uh, what are you doing?” Tony asked with a slight tremor in his voice. He could feel the goose bumps forming along his arms and stomach.

“Checking to make sure that you aren’t leaking anything, strange.” Pepper said matter of factly as her fingers traced their torturously slow circumference of the reactor. When she had finished she rubbed her fingers together and squinted at them in the dim light of the car. They were dry. “No blood, pus, or that other weird stuff,” she said referring to the silicone byproduct produced by the reactor.  
A moment of heavy silence filled the car.   
“I just needed to make sure,” Pepper said quietly. She realized how close she was to Tony and that her hand was flat against his chest holding his shirt up. She pulled her hand away slowly and gently pulled his shirt back down. She slid away and settled back in the seat.

Tony adjusted his shirt and started to button it up. 

“What happened to your hand?” Pepper asked sliding back next to him.

“Huh?” Tony said looking down at his hands as he did up another button. There was a raw red patch across the knuckles of his right hand. He was surprised, and slightly delighted, when Pepper reached out and took his hand bringing it closer so she could inspect the injury.

“Must have been from when I decked that guy. Who was huge by the way, in case you hadn’t noticed.” 

“I am aware of his height, yes.” Pepper said blandly as she looked at Tony’s abraded knuckles.

“Just wanted to point out how big a guy that I took down. . .” Tony said with a bit of bravado.

“Actually, I think his friends had a bit more to do with it.” Tess said front the front seat.

“Thanks Tess,” Tony said in irritation. But he was pleased to see Pepper laughing silently. Tony put his left arm across the top of the seats and Pepper slid just a fraction closer on the seat. “All a part of a days work, you know.”

“Hm,” Pepper said in a non-committed tone as she ran her thumb over Tony’s knuckles. 

“What’s the diagnosis?” Tony asked in a playful tone. “Will I live?”

“No broken skin,” Pepper said not rising to his bait. “So this time yes. But if you do anything that stupid again Mr. Stark, I will kill you.”

Tony grinned at her, “Warning duly noted Ms. Potts. You know you could kiss it and make it better.” 

Pepper arched her brow at him in that, ‘oh but you wish’ way of hers and started to slide back across the seat. But before she let go of his hand she kissed the thumb of her free hand and quickly skimmed it across his knuckles. Then she leaned back in her seat and stared out the window as if nothing had happened.   
Tess who had observed all of this silently from up front, turned back around in her seat. Silence filled the car as collectively the adrenaline rush of the last few minutes wore off. No one seemed inclined to start a conversation. Tess leaned again the door, she felt exhausted, jet lag and lack of sleep were taking their toll. She just wanted to get some uncomplicated sleep. Christ how did Pepper deal with this madness on a regular basis?

Eventually the car came to Pepper’s street. Tess snapped herself slightly more awake and sat up. A quick look in the back revealed something interesting. Tony had kept his left arm on the back of the seat, but during the drive it had “slid” down and was now resting lightly across Pepper’s shoulders. Pepper had remained sitting in the middle of the seat, having not slid all the way back to the other side after examining Tony’s hand. She had her eyes closed, but it didn’t look like she was asleep, her body was not relaxed enough for that. Tony was staring out the window, and they both were doing a damn good job of pretending not to notice where his arm was.

Tess smiled to herself and shook her head. She caught Happy’s eye and he gave an almost imperceptible shrug. They could give enabling seminars at Stark Industries, Tess thought wryly. And I could lead them, she mentally chided herself. The car stopped in Pepper’s driveway. 

“Thanks for the lift Happy.” Tess said.

“Any time,” Happy answered. 

“Have any exciting plans for the rest of the evening?” she heard Tony ask. She turned and flashed him a smile. “Well Pepper and I do have a scheduled sweaty pillow fight planned, it’s a rematch from earlier.”

Tony gave a huge smile, “You know. At great personal cost to me, I would be willing to offer my services as referee or possibly camera man.”

“Much appreciated, but I think we are all set.” Pepper said loftily as she opened her eyes and sat forward, out from under Tony’s arm.

“I think that you say these things to hurt me Ms. Potts. At least let me escort you ladies to you door.” Tony opened the door and got out. 

“See you later Happy,” Pepper said sliding across the street and getting out. 

Tess flashed Happy a smile and got out as well. The three of them walked to the door. Pepper dug out her keys.

“I got this Pep,” Tess said taking the keys from her friend’s hands. “The alarm code that same as that one time with the thing?” Pepper nodded.

“You guys speak in code! I will have to set up a translation algorithm.” Tony said sarcastically.

“I am sure you will. Well, yet another interesting evening Tony. Right well, g’night.” Tess quickly stepped up to Tony and kissed him lightly on the cheek. She gave him a tired smile, “That on was from me. Be seeing you Pepper’s boss. Night kids.” And with that she unlocked the door and went inside.

This left Pepper and Tony alone, in a slightly awkward silence. Pepper faced Tony.

“Um.” Was all she managed before Tony started talking quickly.

“Look Pepper, about that thing with Tess outside the club, I didn’t know what to do she just kinda, grabbed me,” he gave a sheepish grin. 

Pepper gave a small shrug. “That’s Tess for you. I think she was trying to make a point.”

“Oh.” 

“I don’t blame you.”

“Oh, good. I’ve already been punched enough this evening.” Tony joked.

“I was,” she paused and thought for a moment, “alarmed. He hit you so hard.” Her tone softened a bit. “You missed a button,” she said.

Tony looked down to see that his shirt was slightly askew. Pepper reached out and began fixing them. When she was done, she lightly placed her hand over the reactor. Tony felt his pulse quicken.

“I’m glad you’re ok,” Pepper said softly.

“Are you ok?” Tony asked stepping a bit closer, but trying no to be obvious about it.

“What do you mean?”

Tony reached up and gently ran his index finger down the bridge of Pepper’s nose. Her stomach gave a small flip at the contact.

“Your nose.” A pensive looked crossed Tony’s face and he seemed to be trying to decide something. Pepper stood very still. “I’m so very sorry,” Tony started and he had to clear his throat. “I never meant for anything like that to happen.” He lowered his head slightly and looked up at her, “You know that right? That I would never hurt. . .” his voice hitched again and he stopped. 

Why hasn’t she moved her hand Tony wondered. He like the light pressure of it. His nerves were humming. He looked at her, she was biting her bottom lip. What was she thinking? Is she still mad? Oh god she’s still mad.

“Then I showed up here all fucked up. At least more so than usual. . .” He trailed off. And then your friend snogged me right in front of you and I liked it. Oh shit, he hates me. He couldn’t meet her gaze. “Are you mad at me?” 

Tony’s voice was so quiet Pepper almost didn’t catch it. He sounded so worried. Pepper wasn’t sure how much more of this she could take before she screamed. Part of her was trying very hard not to be furious with Tess for kissing Tony. But it was what she said before she got in the car that had really hit home. Tony and gotten into a fight at a bar with a kid that could have really messed him up. He had taken a punch that could have caused some serious internal damage. He broke a guy’s nose. And all of this because the kid was drunk and harassing her. She knew he cared, but damn, this was something that she never thought would happen to her. A bar fight over her? Never in a million years.

Pepper looked at her hand on Tony’s chest. I should move that she thought, but she didn’t. Tony was really close, she gave a internal sigh. And he is wearing that cologne. All of this and he was afraid that she was mad at him. 

“No,” Pepper said quietly, “I’m not mad at you Tony.”

He looked up at her and smiled. Relief washed over him. Tony couldn’t help himself, he brought his hand up and placed it gently on her upper arm. He could feel goose bumps. She must be cold, he though vaguely, and started running his hand slowly and gently up and down her arm to try and warm her.

Pepper’s stomach gave a full flip this time. She remembered the feel of his arms around her as he clung desperately to her the night before. How he had pleaded with her not to leave him. Not the company, but him. 

Tony moved in half a step, her hand pressed a little firmer against his chest. “Why didn’t you dance with me this evening Ms. Potts?” Tony’s voice was a soft rumble.

Pepper was sure that her heart skipped at beat, but she fought for a calm that she didn’t feel. “We’ve already danced once this year Mr. Stark. It is not a requirement in my contract.” She said softly into his ear. How did I not notice that he had gotten so close, Pepper wondered.

Tony’s skin was tingling where he could feel Pepper’s breath on his ear and neck. Her scent was so familiar that he would know it anywhere. He wanted to bring his other arm up, to wrap it around her and pull her closer. Instead he just tilted his head more until he could feel his goatee brush her cheek. “Maybe I need to renegotiate your contract.”

Pepper slowly moved her hand up across Tony’s chest until her hand rested lightly on the top of his shoulder. There was a slight tremor, was that him or her hand? She couldn’t say for sure. “One could say that we are dancing now.”

Tony ran his hand up Pepper’s arm, across her shoulder and down, coming to rest on her hip. “One could.” Tony knew that they weren’t just at the line, they were both standing on it. Each one was waiting for the other to pull them over, both being too unwilling (scared?) to be the one to do the pulling. 

So they stood, frozen, on their line waiting. And then Tony could feel Pepper pulling away. A small subtle shift of weight and she was pulling away from him, and Tony knew that he couldn’t hold her. Pepper’s hand slid down and away from Tony’s shoulder. Pepper felt Tony’s goatee brush her cheek as she pulled back. There was the briefest of moments of hesitation when Pepper felt Tony hold his hand on her back, as if to stop her, but his hand dropped and she took a step away.

They were still very close, but no longer touching. Pepper suddenly felt cold and gave a shiver.

“I should be getting in,” she said quietly.

“I suppose so,” Tony agreed. He didn’t want her to go. “But did you have fun at least?” 

“I did,” she gave him a smile that sent a small flare of warmth through his chest. “But the whole punching out a drunk kid, was less than fun,” Pepper chided, but gently.

“Yeah well.”

“You’re starting to like this hero stuff aren’t you?

Tony smiled, “Are you calling me a hero Pepper?”

Pepper said nothing, but then did something that even surprised herself. She came forward a few inches and rested her forehead against Tony’s for a few moments. She stepped back again and met Tony’s slightly surprised look. 

“I will see you on Tuesday Mr. Stark.”

“Tuesday Ms. Potts.”

Pepper turned and walked inside. Tony stood for a moment, watched the door closed then walked to the car. He got in the back and stretched out across the back seat. His chest ached, but that was from the punch he was sure of it. 

“Let’s go Happy. I’m really tired.”

“Sure thing.”

Tony felt the car moving. He put his arm over his eyes and wished that he was home.

Pepper watched the car pull away from the peep hole in the door, and turned and walked further into the house. She could see that the light was on in the kitchen. Pepper found Tess sitting at the island drinking a glass of water. 

“Hey,” Pepper said sitting down on the other stool. She felt very tired, but Tess looked absolutely exhausted. “You ok?”

“Yeah. It’s just all catching up with me I guess. What about you? How are things?”

“That’s a loaded question Tess.” Pepper said propping her elbow on the island and resting her head in her hand. She could still smell Tony on her. Was it from the car or from outside? She didn’t know.

“Really? Not my intention.” Tess paused and took a sip of water. “I want to apologize for kissing Tony. I shouldn’t have, he’s your-“

“Boss, Tess.” Pepper interrupted slightly irritated. “Why did you say that the kiss was from me?” Pepper was starting to feel anger boil up, but she was trying to keep it in check. She didn’t know if she was angry at Tess, Tony, or herself for being mad at them. 

“Aww, Pepper. It was stupid of me. But I mean, one of us had to and it didn’t look like it was going to be you.”

“That is a crock of shit Tess. And if I might add, that was way longer than 5 Mississippis.” Pepper was slightly irritated, but her and Tony, there really wasn’t a “them” was there? But she was definitely not going to let Tony Stark come between her and one of her oldest friends.

Tess let out a sigh of relief. “I was really hoping that that rule was still in effect. Sorry, my brain sorta froze for a second,” Tess gave a sheepish grin. “It was not intentional, please believe that.”

“Your brain froze?” Pepper said with a barely suppressed laugh.  
“Swear to god Pep. And I am not proud of the fact. But enough about me being newly single and slightly stupid. Did you guys have a nice chat?”

“Don’t leer at me like that,” Pepper said in irritation. “He did apologize though. For the whole unpleasantness with the door. I think that is the first time I have ever seen that.”

They were silent for a moment.

“But you still didn’t get any?” Tess said flatly, “Pep that’s just not right.”

It took two full seconds before Pepper couldn’t suppress her laugh anymore. All the fear, worry and yes frustration of the past two days seem suddenly so ludicrous. Normal? What the fuck was that? Tess laughed as well, just so tired and overwrought. 

“Fuck you,” Pepper said tried to calm her near hysterics. She gave Tess a playful shove.

“Well I know someone who would probably pay to watch,” Tess said wiping tears from her eyes. She took a deep breath, “So we’re ok then? I couldn’t bear it if we weren’t.”

Pepper got up and gave her friend a hug. “We’re good. I just,” she sighed. “I dunno, sometimes things are just so weird.”

“That’s cause you live in California.” Tess said with a yawn. “Shit I’m tired.” She yawned again, this time so hard that her jaw popped. 

“Right,” said Pepper. “Sleep now.” And she got up and headed upstairs. 

“Promise me something Pep,” Tess said as she followed her friend upstairs.

“Sure.”

“That tomorrow with be a Tony Stark free day. I don’t think I can take much more of this.”

“You just don’t have the practice.” Pepper said stifling a yawn.

“And I don’t think I want it.”

“It could always be worse.”

“Indeed. I mean really, for an ego-driven, self-centered, obsessive, emotionally crippled, genius, man-child he’s really all you could want. Don’t ever make him change Pep.” Tess said with a snort.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tess gets surprised, Pepper gets a new shirt, and Tony has email.

Tess had requested a Tony Stark free day, but that was not what she woke up to. What she woke up to was a very loud,

“MOTHER FUCKER!” from down stairs. 

It was about 8 am, and Tess was still exhausted, but the expletive startled her into action. She jammed her glasses on and ran downstairs, wonder what the hell was going on. What she found was Pepper in her pajamas pacing the kitchen in irritations and hammering away at her Blackberry.

“What? What? Are you ok?” Tess asked.

Pepper looked up at her friend and winced. “Shit. I woke you up.”

“Yeah whatever, what the hell is going on?”  
Pepper shook her head. She got a mug from the cabinet, poured some coffee milk in it and handed it to Tess.

“Is something wrong?” Tess asked concerned as she took the mug.

“No, nothing is ‘wrong’ per se, it is just another fun aspect of working for Tony Stark. Yesterdays little ruckus at the club? It’s now become a PR issue.”

“Shit, is the kid suing or something?”

“At this point no, and I have a feeling that won’t be an actual issue. . . Oh Tess, there are pictures. . .”

Tess felt ice slide down her back. The memory of her and Tony on the dance floor stabbed her stomach with guilt. She tried to keep her voice calm. “Pictures of what?”

Pepper massaged her eyes. “Of the fight.”

Tess smiled with relief, “That’s not too bad.”

“And of you and Tony.”

“What?!” Tess’s voice was filled with horror. Oh god, oh god, oh god! “Have you seen them?”

“Yes.”

Silence filled the kitchen. “Show me.”  
Pepper got her laptop and booted it up. In the few minutes that it took, neither said anything. From upstairs Tess could hear her phone ringing, over and over again, along with the chimes of text message alerts. She didn’t move. Finally Pepper pulled up a website, one of the Hollywood gossip ones. 

“Screaming Jesus in a centrifuge,” was all Tess could manage. She didn’t read the text, just scrolled through the pictures. 

There was one of her and Tony right as they got out of the car, his hand around her waist pushing her forward. The next was them on the dance floor, but Tess was very relieved to see it was one where she and Tony were both laughing. She was in profile, but he was turned more towards the camera. But still her arm was over his shoulder and his hand was loosely on her hip. But it could have been so much worse.

“Where you telling him the one about the young girl from Berlin?” Pepper asked with a slight smile.

“A version of ‘There once was a man from Nantucket’ I believe. Frankly I was surprised he didn’t know that one.” Tess said smiling in relief.

“Your knowledge of the fine art of the Limerick is varied and obscure.” Pepper said with a small laugh. And that was all either of them said about that picture.

The next one had Tess giving a low whistle. It was obviously taken with a camera phone, but it was still a pretty good quality picture. It was of Tony taking the punch to his chest, or at least the second after. Brian the drunken Giant’s arm was still fully extended, his body in the follow through. But his hand was pulling back just slightly, and it was obvious that something was wrong. The shape didn’t look quite right, and there was an expression of pain on his face. Tony on the other hand was in middle of rocking back with the force of the blow. Both knees were slightly bent, but his right leg was back slightly, which was what had kept him upright. His left arm was down, but the hand was in a fist and his entire arm was flexed. Eyes shut, it was obvious from his face that it had hurt. But it was still really impressive. The height and size difference was even more evident in the photo.

“Damn,” Tess with a bit of awe in her voice. 

Pepper just nodded. Her expression held a mixture of worry, remembered fear and, was it pride? 

“It makes your boss look like a bad ass Pep. It can’t be bad for his image or anything.”

“Nooooo,” Pepper said slowly, “but I’m not too sure about this next one.”

It was of Tony breaking the kid’s nose. Tony’s fist was in follow through, the kid’s head was slightly snapped back and there was just evidence of blood spurting from his nose. It was very obvious the rage with which Tony had hit the kid. His teeth bared face contorted into what look like a snarl. The muscles in his arms stood out, and the veins in his neck stood out like cords. Tess would not have been surprised to see a bright light flaring out of the arc reactor, but of course that was just being silly.

“Yikes. I was there and it’s still a bit shocking. Dude, he was pissed. Lucky that kid’s buddies brought him down, it could have gotten really ugly really fast.”

“Yeah,” Pepper gave a sigh. “There is still one more.”

And indeed there was. It was of Tess laying one on Tony. It was a profile shot, must have been taken with a telephoto lens from up the street. You could see Tony’s hand on her hip and Tess leaning into him, with her one hand on his face and the other one on his bicep. Tess didn’t recall doing that, and she hated to admit, but it was kind of hot. Then the guilt hit her, because the worse thing, the thing that made it just plane wrong was the caption, which read “My Hero”. Oh Fuck.

“Oh Pep,” she said slightly miserable, “I am so sorry.”

“Well,” Pepper said in a resigned voice, “I can see why your brain froze.” There was a moment of silence before she continued. “It’s not easy working for a man-whore you know.”

 

The sob that had been working it’s way from Tess’s chest got stuck. She choked. Looked at her friends in wide-eyed astonishment and started to laugh. She couldn’t help it. She laughed, but eventually it turned back into a sob. Tess put her head on the counter. 

“I swear Pep,” Tess said in absolute misery, “I was not macking on your boss. You guys were fighting about it and it was so stupid and I just thought that maybe I could prove some sort of point. But after a second he sorta started to kiss back and I just got stupid.”

“It’s ok Tess,” Pepper said. The slight pain of jealousy that she had felt last night and again after seeing the picture was nothing compared to how she felt watching her friend tear herself apart with remorse. She felt hot tears sting her eyes.

“As long as you promise it was just a rebound thing,” Pepper said with a levity that she didn’t really feel.

Tess’s sobs turned into hiccups, then to laughter at this. She looked at Pepper and wiped her eyes. Giving a half-hearted smile she said, “Oh if only I could see the look on Rob’s face if he ever sees this.” Tess giggled.  
Pepper laughed, “Nothing helps you get over the last one like the next one. My rebound was a cute guy named Vince. He had very nice abs,” Pepper gave a slow smile at the memory. “So I suppose you could do a lot worse than Tony Stark.”

Tess gave a laugh and shook her head, “Yeah. Tony fucking Stark. Vince eh? You never did mention his name to me. I toasted you on getting laid again Pep, just so you know.”

“Well just as long as you call and let me know so I can toast you. But for the love of god don’t email it to me at work. I don’t want to even think about the email he would send you.”

“Hell he might send champagne,” Tess said laughing.

“No seriously, he probably would.” 

“And this is why you don’t let him meet your friends.”

“Exactly. Actually you are the only one he’s met. And for that I will forever apologize to you.”

Tess laughed, “I won’t lie and say it was a horrible time.”

They were both quiet for a moment, then Pepper said, “If you ever tell anyone I asked this I will deny it categorically. How good was that kiss?”

Tess though about this for a second. “Hm not an awkward question at all Pep. Ok, I will put it this way. If he was not your boss,”

“Ok.”

“And we were not such good friends, you are the wind beneath my wings by the way,”

“Awwww. But also a given.”

“I would tap that like a keg at a frat party. I would try to wreck that man, and if I never walked normally again it would still be worth it.”

Pepper gave a small snorting laugh.

“But all that being said, for a second I forgot my own name. You should try it some time and we can compare notes.”

There was a soft smack as Pepper punched Tess on the shoulder. 

“Ow, Pep I bruise easy,” Tess said with a laugh. 

Pepper’s Blackberry started to go into fits, vibrating across the counter. With a sigh she picked it up and looked at the caller ID. 

“It’s the attorney. I need to take this and do some damage control,” Pepper said flatly and got up to take the call privately upstairs. 

Tess scrolled back up and read the story as she drank her coffee. The basic details were that Tony Stark was seen arriving at such and such club with an unknown women. Sources say, probably that girl that was hitting on Tony, Tess theorized, that she was from the East Coast and was there celebrating a “special occasion” with Stark. And it was here that things got weird. Stark was seen dancing with said woman, which was true. But later an altercation arose at the bar when an unnamed man made unwanted advances towards Stark’s companion. Tess pondered this. She was at the bar yes, but it was Pepper the guys was talking to. Did people just confuse her and Pepper because they looked similar? It was highly likely. Tess read on.

The unnamed man then threw an unprovoked punch at Stark, catching him squarely in the chest. Stark then defended himself and his date (oh so now Tess was a ‘date’. Was this an upgrade from companion?) by throwing a mighty punch and breaking the unnamed man’s nose. Further escalation was prevented by club security. At the time of this articles release, Stark has been unavailable for comment. This was a shit storm alright, but it didn’t make anyone sound too bad. Except for poor Brian who was obviously too stupid to not hit on ‘Stark’s woman’. Tess gave a small laugh, a Stark free day was too much to hope for in the World of Virginia Potts she supposed. 

The rest of that day was considerably less exciting than the morning had been. Tess fielded lots of calls from friends, and even one from her mom, which was weird, wanting to know what the deal was. Tess decided to do a bit of PR herself and give non-answer answers. 

“Are you seeing/dating/fucking Tony Stark?”

“A lady never tells, and a gentleman/lady/friend never asks.” 

And “Christ Mom! What would Dad say hearing you ask me that?”

“Dad would say just use protection cause you don’t know where he’s been.”

“Ow, I think part of my soul died Mom. I am hanging up now.”

And while the morning was a frenzy of Stark related activity, the rest of the day was theirs. They spent their time with no real goals in mind, just enjoying each other’s company. There was a unspoken feeling of melancholy though, as neither knew when they would next get a chance to visit. With Pepper’s job and Tess’s move it felt like life was spiraling away too quickly. They talked about the next reunion, and both promised to be there. 

“But the good thing about you being in New York Tess, is that we end up going there on business, so I will try and give you a call every time.” Pepper said earnestly.

“But realistically, I know that you might not be able to break away. But 6 out of 10 aint too bad.” Tess agreed. 

They had stayed up way too late talking last night, Tess thought to herself as she ran around trying to make sure she wasn’t forgetting anything. They had both overslept, and now were frantically hurrying to get out the door so that Tess could make her flight. She checked her watch again, This time of the morning in LA traffic, shit she might not make it. 

“It’s like those nightmares you have when you’re stressed out.” Tess said aloud as she ran down the steps with her bag. 

“No kidding,” Pepper said emerging from the kitchen, “except this time it’s actually happening.”

“How fast can you drive Pepper?” Tess asked as she pulled on her running shoes without bothering to tie them.

“Really fucking fast. But traffic is another thing.” Pepper grabbed her purse and headed to the door.

“Wallet, phone, keys, tickets,” Tess said as she patted herself down. “Right let’s do this. I suppose that if I miss my flight. . .”

“You won’t.” Pepper insisted.

“Yeah but if I do, then I can maybe fly standby, or just get another ticket to like Chicago or Cleveland or something then go from there.”

They both hit the front door at almost a run, Pepper threw it open, and stopped short as Tony stood smiling in the doorway. 

“Ow, fuck!” Pepper said as Tess collided with her.

“What! Why are we not moving?”

“In a hurry ladies,” Tony said with an easy smile and infuriating calm. He checked his watch, “Hm, running behind are we? That’s a statistic anomaly for you Ms. Potts. You should have been on the road almost 40 minutes ago.”  
“Pepper’s boss,” Tess said through gritted teeth, “A move it or lose it scenario is probably your best option at this point.”

Pepper shot Tess a look, shooed her out onto the door step so she could lock the front door. Time is infinite, space is infinite, Pepper thought, but my patience is not.

“It’s Monday Tony,” She said with a forced calm. 

“It is,” he agreed.

“I have to get Tess to the airport, her flight leave in an a little over an hour. So whatever it is will have to wait.”

“Well,” Tony said with a slight pout, “I was going to offer you a lift, but if you’d rather. . .”

“No time to argue Pep,” Tess said sprinting around her friend to the waiting town car. She ripped open the door, threw her bag inside and followed it.

Tony gave Pepper his practiced GQ smile, “Far be it for me to say, but I think our friend Tess needs to switch to decafe.”

“LET”S GO!” bellowed Tess from inside the car.

Tony shoved his hands into the pockets of his suit pants and sauntered down to the car, Pepper trying madly to rein in her temper and not garrote him with his own Italian silk tie. 

“You know,” Tony said casually as when they were rolling down the driveway, “I’ve been waiting for almost an hour for you ladies to leave. I understand that it’s a woman’s prerogative to keep a gentleman waiting, but really, that’s just being rude.”

“Pepper’s boss,” Tess said as she was re-scanning the departure time on her ticket for the fifth time that morning, “are you trying to make me throttle you? Cause I am pretty sure that we would have time to dump your body and still make my flight.” She checked her watch, “Maybe.” 

“Um, Hap?” Pepper asked slightly confused, “Are you taking a different way to LAX or something?”

Tess’s head snapped up, “We’re not going to the airport?” Tess said, a slight note of panic in her voice. 

“Oh we are,” Tony said smugly, obviously enjoying himself, “but not LAX.”

“But the only other airport out this way is,” understanding dawned for Pepper, “Oh.”

She arched a surprised eyebrow at Tony. “Really? Are you sure?”

Tony grinned. He was really enjoying this. But Tess was about to lose it.

“What?! What? You complain that Pepper and I speak in code! What the fuck is going on?”

“We’re heading to the private airfield.” Pepper said slowly.

“Where the Stark Enterprises jet is waiting to whisk you away to your destination of sunny New York City. All amenities included.” Tony said in a matter of fact tone, as if Tess should have know this was the plan all along.

“Uhhh,” Tess said. 

“A thank you would be nice,” Tony chided.

“Uhhh, thanks,” Tess said in astonishment. “But you didn’t have. . .”

“No I didn’t,” Tony said in a business like tone. “But I wanted to. So you could refuse this very generous use of my resources. We could turn around, take you back and you could miss your flight and have to fly standby through Decater.” Ah thought Tess, and the walls have been rebuilt, and possibly fortified with the spackle of ego and self indulgence. 

“Or,” Tony continued in a lighter tone, “you can relax a for a second and just except that I am doing something nice for my ‘unknown companion from the East Coast’. I thought those were great photos, didn’t you Pepper?” Tony gave a devilish grin. “Are all of your friends that photogenic, or is it just Tess?”

Tess sat back with a groan but Pepper was all business, “I haven’t received any further information on if our giant friend with the broken hand will be pressing charges.”

“I think it highly unlikely that he will,” Tony said easily. “After all he is the instigator in all of this,” he turned an intense gaze on Pepper, “with perhaps a little help on your part Ms. Potts.”

“Hm, well as I recall the incident Mr. Stark,” Pepper said in a business like tone, refusing to rise to Tony’s bait, “I believe that un-requested aide and male bravado could very well be the real culprits.”

They stared at each other in silence. Tess watched with interest. My god, she realized, this is their foreplay! Pepper can’t afford to back down, and if she did he wouldn’t respect her for it. So she has to hold out and win, because that’s what does it for him, in part. Wow, enabling and psychological war fare seminars to be held bi-monthly at Stark Enterprises. Then she saw it, just the slightest of flickers. There was a crack in the wall that was Tony Stark, a blind side that only Pepper knew. I really hope she uses her powers for good, Tess thought. 

Pepper gave a cool smile, and Tony blinked. She’s got him. Tess bit the inside of her lips to keep from laughing. Tony must have sensed this cause he turned to her, amped up the voltage of his smile and asks,

“So are, like we going steady now? Cause the guys in study hall say you’re just using me for my car.” He batted his lashes at her.

“Really?” Tess said with interests, “cause I thought that they were calling me a cock tease these days. You wanna ask Happy if he and Pepper wanna go on a double date to the malt shop?”

Tony blinked. “And here I was all ready to give my letterman jacket and everything.” He pouted.

“I didn’t think they gave out letters for the Chess and Physics clubs,” Tess said mildly.

Pepper snickered, trying to hide it behind her hand, and Tony went slightly pink. He leaned back in the seat and crossed his arms scowling.

“Tony was actually the president of both the Chess and Physics clubs,” Pepper says to Tess, trying so hard not to laugh that it hurts.

Tess actually feels bad. It’s hard to remember sometimes that Tony was 14 when he went to college, so he was, would have been 10 or 11 in high school. 

‘If it makes you feel any better Tony,” Tess said in a slightly apologetic tone, “I was in marching band, polyester uniform and fuzzy hat, the whole bit.”

Tony’s scowl lessens somewhat, “did you play the tuba?” 

“No but I dated a tuba player,” she gave a smile when Tony laughed at this, “don’t scoff, they have excellent breath control.” She waggled her eyebrows at him as she sees it dawn on him.

“Huh? Ooohhh. Your friend is a deviant Pepper.”

“And I am working for one,” Pepper muttered.

“What?”  
“What?”

“So I don’t get your letter sweater? Bummer. Can I at least keep your class ring?” Tess batted her lashes back at Tony. “By the way, you do look like a total bad-ass in those picture of the fight.”

Tony grinned and actually puffed his chest out a bit. “I did, didn’t I? Pepper do you think that they can make action figures of me, I mean Iron Man?”

Pepper just rolled her eyes.

They made it eventually to the airfield, and true to his word, the Stark jet was waiting on the tarmac. Happy stopped the car and they all piled out. Happy took Tess’s bag from her and walked it out to the jet to hand over to the crew. The three of them stood there awkwardly for a moment.   
“Well,” Tess said, “It’s been one hell of a vacation.” She went to shake Tony’s hand, but he opened both arms a bit awkwardly. Aw, hell, Tess though. She gave him a slightly awkward hug patting his shoulder lightly, Tony doing the same. But before she pulled away Tess whispered into his ear, “Keep her safe.” 

Tess felt Tony freeze for a second and then he gave a slight nod. She backed away, “Oh, awesome awkward hug Pepper’s boss. We need to do that more often.”

Tony grinned at her. But there was no awkwardness in the bear hug that Tess and Pepper shared. “I’m so glad you came.”

“Thanks for having me. Don’t be a stranger, call me when you come to New York.” Tess said. The women hugged in silence for another moment, and when they parted Tony was surprised to see that both looked slightly teary. But Tess gave a smile and headed to the plane. At the door she gave a final wave and disappeared inside. 

As the jet pulled away Tess watched her friend waving from the tarmac. And for a second, one brief second, it looked like Tony was going to put his arm around her, but stopped himself. Tess sat back and closed her eyes.

Pepper was mostly silent on the ride back to her house. Tony tried several times to engage her in conversation, then he tried teasing her, but she rose to none of it. Pepper merely stared out the window at the passing scenery with a slightly bleary look in her eyes. Tony sunk into an uneasy silence. Caught between what he wanted to say and the reality that tomorrow Pepper would be back efficiently running his life, with seemingly little regard to her own, Tony felt very lonely for some reason.

They were a block before Pepper’s house before Tony had the courage to break the silence.

“I liked you friend,” he said simply.  
“She liked you too.”

Tony smiled, “Really?”

Pepper met his gaze. “She wouldn’t have been so sarcastic if she didn’t.”

“High praise, I am flattered.”

Pepper gave him a level look that made Tony’s smile falter for a moment. “You should be.” Pepper said simply.

Tony was silent for a moment. He thought hard. “We’ll be going to New York soon.”

“Yes.”

“Plus it’s not like you won’t be able to find her in the S.H.I.E.L.D headquarters,” Tony said.

“What?!” Pepper jolted upright. 

Tony blinked in surprise, “Yeah, her new job is with S.H.I.E.L.D. She didn’t tell you that?”

Pepper thought hard, Tess had said the government, and Pepper had just assumed.

“I just assumed that she meant the FBI.”

Tony gave a laugh, “Well you know what they say Ms. Potts. When you assume you make an ass of you and me.”

“Takes one to know one,” Pepper muttered. 

“Such sarcasm! It’s very trying you know.”

“I bet.”

Happy stopped the car. Pepper put her hand on the door to get out but stopped. 

“Look Tony,” she said sincerely, “I really do appreciate what you did for her. That was very kind.”

“It’s what we heroes do,” Tony gave her a wolfish smile. “Oh, and one more thing,” Tony reached out and Happy handed him a small bundle. “This is yours. Thanks for the loan.” He handed Pepper Danny’s shirt, neatly laundered and folded.   
“Oh,” Pepper was surprised, she had completely forgotten about the shirt in all the chaos of the last few days. “Oh, right. Um, thanks.” She took the bundle from Tony. 

For a moment it looked like Tony wanted to ask her something. But he changed his mind. “Tomorrow then Ms. Potts, bright and early.”

“Tomorrow Mr. Stark.” Pepper got out of the car and it pulled silently away.

Pepper went inside. She was absolutely exhausted. It was hard to see Tess leave. Having her there was like having a small beacon of normalcy. But Tess working at S.H.I.E.L.D? It was a good career move, but why didn’t she say? Or had she and Pepper just not heard her? She rubber her eyes and felt tears behind her lids. She felt the hot tears building in her throat, but she forced them back down. She was Pepper Potts goddamn it! She could keep it together, had to keep it together.

For something to do she went upstairs to put Danny’s shirt away at the very bottom of her dresser where it normally stayed. At first because she couldn’t bear to get rid of it, then because she never thought about it. Pepper wasn’t sure which was worse. She looked at the shirt and how it was folded, and wondered idly if Tony had Dummy or Butterfingers do it, she wouldn’t put it past him. She started to refold it when another square of material that had been folded inside of it fell out.   
Pepper stared at it, this unknown thing laying on the floor of her bedroom. She picked it up and unfolded it. It took a minute for her to register what it is, and when she did Pepper sat down heavily on the end of her bed. It was an MIT t-shirt. The fabric worn thin from wear and washing, and the letters reading ‘MIT Freshmen Orientation’ are faded and peeling. It would have fit a teenage Tony, and now she was holding it in her hands with fingers that have gone strangely numb. With shaking hands Pepper neatly refolded it, making sure the lettering is facing out so it can be read. Her vision went blurry as hot tears spill from her eyes, spotting the fabric. After a few minutes of just letting the tears fall, Pepper composed herself. She stood up and put the neatly folded shirt away in her top drawer, tucked away in a corner, but visible every time she opens the drawer. The UC Berkley shirt gets relegated to the top shelf in the closet.

 

To: tstark@starkindustires.com  
From: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com  
Subject: An interesting development

Pepper’s boss,

Imagine my surprise upon returning to New York yesterday and finding, not only a hired car waiting to drag my horribly jet lagged ass home, but also an envelope containing keys, a lease and a notification that my home has now been relocated to the Upper West Side. Knock me down with a cliché if there was not also notification that my belonging were no longer in storage but at my new apartment.  
How could this be I wondered? I as a humble government employee could not possibly hope to afford such posh digs, especially since I have yet to start work. But the building manager assured me that all was in order and that he is always happy to accommodate Mr. Stark with his apartment needs.

One is puzzled. Perhaps an explanation if you are not too busy saving the world or going over toy designs. 

Tess

P.S. The case of Easy Mac was a nice touch. What no Ramen noodles?

 

To: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com  
From: tstark@starkindustires.com  
Subject: re: An interesting development

Pepper’s friend,

Nice email address by the way, why not just call yourself NaCl for god’s sake? It’s about as subtle. Is the apartment not satisfactory? I can move you somewhere else if you like. I just thought it was a nice location within easy commuting distance from your new employer, or so the real-estate agent assured me. I will have him flogged if this is not so. 

Would it make you and your fucking pride feel better if I told you that I won it in a card game? For a mental health professional you seem to be lacking in some basic interpersonal skills. Physician heal thyself. 

As for the toy designs, there seems to be some dispute about how large I can reasonably have my cod piece and still be considered appropriate for children. That and they make my face look all smashed. I don’t think I look heroic enough. Pepper thinks I am being stupid. Can you talk to her? She won’t listen to me. Glad you like the Easy Mac, I think the red wine will go nicely with that, it’s in the rack.

Tony “The Invincible Iron Man” Stark

P.S What did you think of the other housewarming gift?

 

To: tstark@starkindustries.com  
From: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com  
Subject: re: re: An interesting development

Tony,

Could you be anymore of a science nerd? Did you also get a letter in the Science Club too? And no, if Pepper says you are being stupid, then nothing I say will change her mind. Plus, she is probably right. Think of the children Tony, no action figures are atomically correct. Poor Ken, it’s like gender reassignment gone horribly wrong. You have a reputation to consider. How can they make your face look smashed? You wear a helmet for god’s sake. 

Ok, so you are calling me out on the pride thing (ring ring ‘Hello kettle this is Pot. Guess what? YOUR BLACK!’) and I won’t say that your wrong. It’s just a bit of a shock that’s all. Um, I will be getting my own place so I won’t overstay my welcome. Thanks, and I do mean that.

As for the house warming gift – are those the original photos from that gossip website? Do I even want to know what you paid for them? The frame is nice though, very classy. Nice layout too – all in chronological order. Except for that snap shot of Pep and I playing pool, where did that one come from? Are there any others that I should be made aware of?

 

Tess

 

To: yellowubrellagirl@gmail.com  
From: tstark@starkindustries.com  
Subject: re: re: re: An interesting development

God you’re stupid! I am so breaking up with you! You can stay there for as long as you like provided that a) you let me have some of your bacon next time and b) you tell your new boss (the big scary black dude with the eye patch) hugs and kisses from me. He’s got a great sense of humor, you’ll see. Just call him Chocobear, everyone else does – he likes it.

Haha – you are not Potts, and I am Iron, not cast iron thank you so bloody much. And no you really don’t want to know how much I spent. Pepper screamed at me for an hour over that one (I gave her copies of them as well). She also seemed troubled by the candid of you guys. Not sure why – I told her that the website of your guys having sweaty pillow fights was a big hit on the internet. She didn’t find that funny for some reason.

 

Tony

P.S. Give me back my class ring and my Cure album.

 

 

To: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com  
From: tstark@starkindustries.com  
Subject: FW: GET BACK TO WORK

This is from Pepper. She is so funny.

 

To: tstark@starkindustries.com  
From: vpotts@starkindustries.com  
Subject: GET BACK TO WORK

ANTHONY EDWARD STARK!!!!

Stop messing around with your Blackberry and pay attention to the Joint Chiefs of Staff! This meeting concerns you and S.H.I.E.L.D so FOCUS.

P.S. straighten your tie

 

To: tstark@starkindusties.com, vpotts@starkindustries.com  
From: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com  
Subject; re: FW: GET BACK TO WORK

She used all three of your names, you’re in trouble now. And seriously as a tax payer, I would like to think that my money isn’t being wasted by someone not paying attention in a meeting concerning national security.

Fine! I’ll give you back “your” Cure album – even though I bought that for you for our 3 week anniversary. But I am keeping your AC/DC shirt, I look cuter in it. Plus I was planning on going to Homecoming with Stevie the Tuba player anyway. He has a cooler car.

 

P.S. You heard the woman Anthony – straighten your tie!

 

To: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com, tstark@starkindustries.com  
From: vpotts@starkindustries.com  
Subject: re: re: FW GET BACK TO WORK

Tessabella MacDermott Morton,

Don’t you encourage him! Plus, you hit reply all doofus.

Tony! Stop futzing with your tie!

P

 

To: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com, vpotts@starkindustries.com  
From: tstark@starkindustries.com  
Subject: re: re: re: FW: GET BACK TO WORK

TESSABELLA MACDERMOTT???!!!!! HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA!!!!

Pepper you know very well I can multitask. Just ask the Swedish National Volleyball team.

Tony “The Incredible Multitasking Iron Man” Stark

P.S. Why did you pick out this tie? I don’t like it, it’s scratchy and makes my head look overly large.

 

To: tstark@starkindustries.com, vpotts@startindustries.com  
From: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com  
Subject: re: re: re: re: FW GET BACK TO WORK

Fuck you Tin Man, it’s a family name. And it’s not the tie that makes your head look overly large, you just have a weird shaped skull, that’s why your action figured looks stupid. 

Tess

P.S. I found my yearbook while unpacking. Tony, wanna come over tonight and take a look? My parents will be at Bingo.

 

To: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com, vpotts@starkindustries.com  
From: tstark@starkindustries.com  
Subject: re: re: re: re: FW: GET BACK TO WORK

See what I did there Potts? That brilliant point about the availability of Iron Man technology integration with S.H.E.I.L.D? I am paying attention. 

Tess, yes I will totally be there. But don’t expect to round too many bases, cause I am saving myself for marriage. I think maybe I’ll get the reindeer picture blown up to poster sized. . . 

P.S. My skull is not weird shaped.

 

 

To: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com, tstark@starkindustries.com  
From: vpotts@starkindustries.com  
Subject: This is my last warning

 

I. HATE. YOU. BOTH. With the fire of 10,000 suns.

Tess, I say this with all the love in my heart. If you show Tony that yearbook, I will show him the pictures from the spring dance Junior year. And I mean all of them.

Tony – you are grounded. You can no longer play with that neighbor girl, she is a bad influence.  
Sit up straight and stop sulking.

P

 

To: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com, vpotts@starkindustries.com  
From: tstark@starkindustries.com  
Subject: re: This is my last warning

Sigh. Fine. Sorry Tess, I can’t come over I’m grounded. But my love for you is eternal – wait for me my darling.

T

 

To: tstark@starkindustries.com, vpotts@startindustries.com  
From: yellowumbrellagirl@gmail.com  
Subject: re: re: This is my last warning

Pepper, your hatred is what keeps me warm at night.

Tony, we’ll play Operation some other time.

Go save the world guys.

Tess


End file.
